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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

No kids at wedding? HUGE UPDATE

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
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Df and I are having a small wedding this fall. We are inviting aprox 40 people, including our wedding party and minister.
All of our friends that have small children know that a wedding is not an appropriate place for them. It's an adult function.
Some family from out of town have very unruly children and at the last wedding they attended they ran up and down the aisle screaming and playing DURING the ceremony. The parents did NOTHING to stop them.
So obviously I don't want that to happen.

I'm debating on how to approach this subject. I figured I would hire my babysitter during that time so the parents wouldn't even have to pay a sitter. My children will be in the wedding but will go to the sitter after and during the reception.
I don't want my children around a bunch of adults drinking. I don't want to have to worry about them annoying our guest, being rowdy, etc.

So, Wwyd? Put an insert in the invites letting them know a sitter will be avalible or call them on the phone?


Whoo hoo! My first feature!


UPDATE: df and I talked about it. He called this family member and explained that our wedding was not child friendly and since they are the only ones bringing kids we would hire our sitter for them. They threw a HUGE bitch fit. So now df is wanting to let their kids come AND be in our wedding. Just to appease this family member. He'll no. We got into a huge fight. I called my father asking for suggestions. He suggested renting a bouncy house and putting it on location. That way the sitter can be at the venue with these kids. I think that's way to much. I'm NOT taking an extra $500 out of my wedding budget for 4 children. NO.
I'm sticking to my guns. It's only ONE family member that feels so entitled to do this. Ugh.
Df and I have agreed to drop it for a few days and revisit the issue after we both calmed down.
Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 7, 2014 at 11:20 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 7, 2014 at 11:23 AM
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 7, 2014 at 11:23 AM
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I don't know how you should go about that.  I understand that having kids at a wedding can be a distraction and sometimes causes some problems. That being said, I wouldn't be attending.  I was recently invited to a wedding(as were my kids) but I didn't go because I know that its hard to keep small children happy during the ceremony and not always the healthiest place for them at the reception.  It wouldn't have mattered to me if someone else was going to pay a babysitter because I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving my kids with someone I don't know.

GL.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 7, 2014 at 11:25 AM
9 moms liked this

I would leave it off the invite since the wedding is just with people you are close with and just call them and explain what you are doing and that a sitter will be provided during the wedding.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 7, 2014 at 11:27 AM
Good food for thought. These are immediate family members, I would be a little hurt if they didn't come. It wouldn't ruin my day though. At least no as much as no one being able to pay attention during the ceremony.

Quoting Anonymous:

I don't know how you should go about that.  I understand that having kids at a wedding can be a distraction and sometimes causes some problems. That being said, I wouldn't be attending.  I was recently invited to a wedding(as were my kids) but I didn't go because I know that its hard to keep small children happy during the ceremony and not always the healthiest place for them at the reception.  It wouldn't have mattered to me if someone else was going to pay a babysitter because I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving my kids with someone I don't know.

GL.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 7, 2014 at 11:29 AM
I'm just so nervous. I just don't want to create waves, kwim? That's why I figured if I foot the bill it wouldn't come off as rude.
Which it's not. I've attended many weddings and only brought my children to the one they where in. I thought I was kind of common sense

Quoting Anonymous:

I would leave it off the invite since the wedding is just with people you are close with and just call them and explain what you are doing and that a sitter will be provided during the wedding.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 7, 2014 at 11:30 AM
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U
sheena696
by Platinum Member on Mar. 7, 2014 at 11:32 AM
18 moms liked this

Best wedding I have been to was one that was kid-free. lol I can't remember, but I am pretty sure it was included somewhere either on the invite or on an insert. Maybe include an insert that the wedding and reception is an adult only function and that babysitting services are available if needed. Then they can contact you if they have an issue with it. I wouldn't bother calling them all. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 7, 2014 at 11:33 AM
M
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 7, 2014 at 11:33 AM
1 mom liked this

 One summer all of my husbands cousins got married there were 6 of them my son at the time was still nursing had never spent a night away from but all the weddings were about 6hrs away for us. We were already on a tight budget then having to travel that far missing work/getting a hotel 6 times was excessive. And all my babysitters (dh family) was at the wedding as well. It sucked my son actually ruined one of the wedding because we had no other options I wish that they had set a sitter up for during the ceremony. It would have been soo much nicer. Just explain it to them but make sure to tell them that it's all the kids not just theirs.

Quoting Anonymous: I'm just so nervous. I just don't want to create waves, kwim? That's why I figured if I foot the bill it wouldn't come off as rude. Which it's not. I've attended many weddings and only brought my children to the one they where in. I thought I was kind of common sense
Quoting Anonymous:

I would leave it off the invite since the wedding is just with people you are close with and just call them and explain what you are doing and that a sitter will be provided during the wedding.

 

B1Bomber
by Ruby Member on Mar. 7, 2014 at 11:34 AM
4 moms liked this
I'd be thrilled to take advantage of free babysitting if it was someone I could trust.
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