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Update/Added: Is it normal for men to keep photos of their exes?

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Does your current so, dh, boyfriend, etc still have photos of an ex around?

I've expressed my concerns to my boyfriend about his photos but he says they are to remind him of where he came from and his life experiences. I told him that they make me uncomfortable. He said he won't get rid of them and its not fair because I have pictures of my ex. But my ex is my fathers son. My boyfriend argues that because he isn't around anymore there is no point in keeping them. My son is two and doesn't remember him.



How would you feel? And is this normal for men or women to do?



Update - he deleted the photos on his laptop slideshow without me saying anything. He noticed and apologized. He doesn't use the laptop very much and forgot that those photos were on there.

And.... For the mothers who's child/ren's father is not your current DH, what did you do with the fathers photos? If your child's biological father is not in the picture, where are his photos now?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
by on Mar. 10, 2014 at 11:44 PM
Replies (11-20):
rvb146
by Gold Member on Mar. 10, 2014 at 11:50 PM
He keeps saying that he wants to keep them to remind him of his past and where he's come from.

Well I want to build a future with him. He wants the same from me. Why keep the past with us? Especially the girl who broke off the engagement. I feel hurt that her photos are still around.

It's us now for goodness sake!

Quoting Hubris_Huntsman: Neither dh nor I have any photos of ex's. If we did it would be because they still meant something to us.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Howardx5
by Platinum Member on Mar. 10, 2014 at 11:50 PM
Depends how the relationship ended I guess.
Annellyse
by on Mar. 10, 2014 at 11:50 PM

The only pictures of my DH's ex in our house are hanging up in my SS's room.  DH doesn't have any personal pictures of her and I don't have any of my exes.

curvygurl1912
by Renee on Mar. 10, 2014 at 11:51 PM

My ex dh got rid of all of his pictures with his ex's while we were dating but didn't tell me until after we got married. I did not get rid of mine and he did not ask me to. Now that we are divorced, he and I both have family pics of both of us with our dd on display in both of our homes. I won't take them down for any man because my dd likes them up. I don't think my ex dh would take his down either if our dd didn't want him too.

JustMeKat
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LETS NOT FORGET THIS
Yesterday at 4:39 AM
by Kat on Mar. 10, 2014 at 11:51 PM

 Me too, I have pics for my kids, they were older when he passed 10 & 16 so they will want them I'm sure.

Quoting Tooth_Inspector: No. My husband was married before, as was I. My ex died so I have a few pictures for my daughters but my husband got rid of all photos of his ex once we got married. Why have that threat and wonder in your marriage if that ex truly means nothing? Are the pictures of the women alone or your DH and his ex?

 

Hubris_Huntsman
by Platinum Member on Mar. 10, 2014 at 11:52 PM
Where is he keeping the photos?

Quoting rvb146: He keeps saying that he wants to keep them to remind him of his past and where he's come from.

Well I want to build a future with him. He wants the same from me. Why keep the past with us? Especially the girl who broke off the engagement. I feel hurt that her photos are still around.

It's us now for goodness sake!

Quoting Hubris_Huntsman: Neither dh nor I have any photos of ex's. If we did it would be because they still meant something to us.
rvb146
by Gold Member on Mar. 10, 2014 at 11:52 PM
He says he's too busy to go through everything and delete her. Excuses. I've given him a timeframe before and nothing happened. This relationship between him and I is very seriously. I am very much in love but how the hell am I suppose to 100% trust him when he can't get rid of photos.

I've expressed how hurt I am, I just feel like he's not fully understanding me.

Quoting Tooth_Inspector: Wow, I can totally see how hurtful that is. He should be able to let go if she means nothing to him. The fact that she's part of his slideshow would piss me off too! Is he completely refusing to do anything about them?

Quoting rvb146: The ex fiancé alone and some with him and her. It wouldn't hurt so much but he accidentally called me by her name. We've been together almost a year now. I understand that they were together for 4 years but why can't he at least change his slideshow on his laptop to not have her on it. I'm here now. This is us now. I'm tired of all these reminders of her.

Quoting Tooth_Inspector: No. My husband was married before, as was I. My ex died so I have a few pictures for my daughters but my husband got rid of all photos of his ex once we got married. Why have that threat and wonder in your marriage if that ex truly means nothing?

Are the pictures of the women alone or your DH and his ex?
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Linda733
by on Mar. 10, 2014 at 11:53 PM

My husband has a strong dislike for his ex and hates having to see her face irl so he tossed all her pics. That was his choice not mine. I could care less because I'm way better looking any way lol 

KyliesMom5
by Platinum Member on Mar. 10, 2014 at 11:53 PM
I still have pictures of ex in frames. But that is for my daughter's sake. It would not bother me if a current boyfriend had pictures of an ex i would not care. Frankly, he would have to be okay with me keeping a picture of myself, parents and siblings from my first wedding out on display.
mommytoacloud
by on Mar. 10, 2014 at 11:53 PM
No i don't think he should keep them but i also agree neither should you
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