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I know wrong group for advice but please I'm desperate...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 69 Replies
1 mom liked this
A few weeks ago I posted about an incident with my dh... Sum of post was he got drunk and threw me into the bar wall with his hand on my throat. I wanted to give him another chance (this isn't the first time he's pushed me into the wall but the first time in front of people). But now I see the patten of abuse beginning again and I want to leave. I don't want to leave broke or without a plan. I've been a sahm for 5 years so I'm secretly looking for a job (he wont let me work and has sabotage 2 jobs I had gotten so I have to go behind his back) I'm also taking money from the food budget and saving it. My question Is how much do I need to save up? If I don't then I will have no choice but welfare and I'm not all about asking for a hand out! I have 3 kids and I am not leaving them behind that is completely out of the question! I already have to throw myself in between dh and the kids when he gets mad at them to prevent them from getting hurt.
Posted by Anonymous on Mar. 12, 2014 at 6:40 PM
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Replies (1-10):
mommy103238
by on Mar. 12, 2014 at 6:41 PM
11 moms liked this
Um get out now and get on welfare. It's not a damn handout out if you actually need it. One day you won't be there to get between him and your kids.
katemckenzie
by Kate on Mar. 12, 2014 at 6:45 PM

Just leave now. If he finds out your planning on leaving or hoarding money, things could get bad real fast.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Mar. 12, 2014 at 6:45 PM
2 moms liked this

I'm anti PA for most, but I think this is a good reason for it. When welfare is used to help get someone back on their feet, there is nothing wrong with it. When it's used as a permanent source of income, I have a problem with it. Leave and take the PA.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Mar. 12, 2014 at 6:47 PM
No I'll always be here... He does not let me leave the house without kids (he wants eye witnesses of I am cheating *insert eye roll or doesn't like dealing with them alone). But I see your point! This f***ing sucks

Quoting mommy103238: Um get out now and get on welfare. It's not a damn handout out if you actually need it. One day you won't be there to get between him and your kids.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Mar. 12, 2014 at 6:48 PM
Call an abuse hotline. They will help you get the resources together to gtfo. Better asap than in the hospital from a coma caused by a head injury or worse
mommaofALT
by Silver Member on Mar. 12, 2014 at 6:49 PM

I would leave now. Go stay with family or a friend or if you can't- a shelter. I grew up watching my mom get abused and it has affected me into adulthood. Get on welfare and hold your head high that you are doing what is best for your kids. 

mommy103238
by on Mar. 12, 2014 at 6:49 PM
One day will be the finally hit and he will kill you then what about your kids? Hm?

Quoting Anonymous: No I'll always be here... He does not let me leave the house without kids (he wants eye witnesses of I am cheating *insert eye roll or doesn't like dealing with them alone). But I see your point! This f***ing sucks

Quoting mommy103238: Um get out now and get on welfare. It's not a damn handout out if you actually need it. One day you won't be there to get between him and your kids.
Peaceful.chaos
by Emerald Member on Mar. 12, 2014 at 6:49 PM
I wouldn't wait. Pack up you and the kids and go to a family member's house or shelter. Do you have access to the bank account? Take half and leave now.
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Mar. 12, 2014 at 6:50 PM
At least 5k.
katyusha42
by Metal Kitty on Mar. 12, 2014 at 6:50 PM
5 moms liked this
This!!!!

Don't wait for things to go from bad to worse. They've already escalated to this point. Leave now, get a lawyer and an order of protection for you and your kids and start documenting EVERYTHING!!! Go to your local dhs office and apply for assistance. Then once you and your kids are safe you can look for a job. You guys being safe super cedes you not wanting to be on pa.

Quoting katemckenzie:

Just leave now. If he finds out your planning on leaving or hoarding money, things could get bad real fast.

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