I will give $50 to the first person who... *UPDATE*
...comes to clean up the shit storm that is DS's bedroom.
He woke up from a late nap, and didn't come out of his room, and I walked by his door and smelled SHIT.
I opened the door and his whole room is covered in SHIT.
IT'S A MURDER SCENE OF POOP. EVERYTHING IS COVERED IN POOP. THE KID, THE CLOTHES, THE WALLS, THE BED, THE CARPET, THE STUFFED ANIMALS, EVERYTHING IS COVERED IN POOP!!!
Okay, I'm not really going to give someone $50, but I'm not dealing with the bedroom. I keep puking. I tossed the kid in the bathtub and hosed him down with the shower sprayer. His bedroom is officially off limits untl DF gets home. DS has never done this before. He's potty trained... Why is he pooping in his room?!?!
Can it be my bedtime yet?
Mmkay, DF isn't able to leave work until 1 am, because they're so busy, so I went in the bedroom, and the smell wasn't so bad once it had all dried, and it was easy to just scrape it off everything in flakes onto the floor and vacuum it all up. I'm having issues getting it all off the walls though, because it's matte white primer, horribly uncleanable.
All his toys except for a few stuffed animals, his My Little Ponies, a couple newer books, and a couple trains have all been bagged up to go in the garage. I disassembled his bed, took his tv, all he has left is a chair, a desk, and a mattress on the floor, and those few toys.
After all the things he's done this week (climbing up to the top of the refrigeratior to get my chocolate cake and eating half of it while I showered on Friday, dumping an entire bag of flour all over the dining room while DF was pooping and I was at my doctor on Monday, eating 4 Sudafed while I was on the phone with his school yesterday and making me have to call poison control, and then smearing shit everywhere today), he's going to have to earn his things back if he wants them. He didn't even seem to care that I was "putting his toys in the trash and throwing them away." He just sat there and laughed and said "okay."
Now I have to figure out how to scrub all the shit out of his mattress that I currently have sitting in the bathtub (we have a spare that he's sleeping on now).
SERIOUSLY IS IT MY BEDTIME YET?