Sdd is 14 and when dh and I picked her up from a friends house she spent the weekend with, she had a clearly unprofessional new tattoo. Dh is mad, sdd isn't talking to anyone, and bm doesn't know yet.
BM got here when she got off worked and her, dh, her SO, and I sat down and discussed what to do over dinner and it's been decided that...
BM and dear husband went to talk to the friend's parents and the friend to let them know what had happened and see if they could find out more about the sitution. When the police getting involved was mentioned Sdd's friend freaked out and told us what sdd wouldn't. It turns out they went to the friend's Aunt and Uncle's house, which wasn't approved by sdd's bm or her bd and she wasn't supposed to be allowed to go anywhere without calling her parent's first, and her cousin who's 19 did the tattoo's and knew both girls were only 14. The friend's parents knew they went to the cousin's house but didn't know about the tattooes so there was an argument between bm/bd and the friend's parents for letting sdd go over there without their permission in the first place. Not sure what's happening if anything as far as punishment with the friend, but sdd is no longer allowed at her house or to associate with her outside of school and basketball since they're on the same team at school. BM said she might reconsider that later down the road since they're both just teenagers that did something stupid, but for right now that's how she wants it because they didn't make a good decision together and BM feels disrespected and doesn't like that the friend's parents didn't ask her permission or tell her before letting her dd go to someone's house she didn't know.
Legally, BM and DH are going to the police station tomorrow to file a police report and figure out exactly what charges can be pressed and what legal action can be taken against the friend's cousin and sdd is going to the doctor tomorrow to have the tattoo looked at and have tests done to make sure she didn't get any type of diseases from the needle since the friend said he used the same needles on both of them.
As far as sdd's punishment. DH isn't letting her get the tattoo removed until she's old enough to pay for either laser or a cover up on her own and with our state laws, she will have to be 16 with parental conscent before anyone professional will touch her with a needle. BM took her phone and grounded her from everywhere except our house for her Spring Break and she's doing all the cooking and cleaning while she's home. Here, all her electronics are being removed from her room so when she's here Wednesday-Sunday she will be grounded here too.