i have been married to my husband for 3 years but with him for 9. things where okay in our relationship until we got married.after the first year he bacame verbally and physically abusive so we got counseling...but during this time ( a year and 3 months) i fell inlove with my husbands cousin. hes amazing in every since that i know of. he knows how i feel and i know how he feels and needless to say we love each other very much. i have never slept with him never kissed him in the mouth or anything like that so our "relationship" isnt based off of sex. lately my husband has been more of an asshole not coming home until 2:02 a.m. last night when he got off of work at 9 and only works 25 minutes from home. no excuse what so ever! well i was talking to the cousin and i dont know what he said but it made me wanna be with him sexually. i guess hearing the way he laughs on the phone at the stupid jokes i tell him and the way he is with me when we r together rushed over me last night and made me feel 16 again with these girly giggles and blushing. well of couse dh wanted sex and if i say no its a big fight so i just closed my eyes and imagined it was his cousin and man i dont think we have ever had better sex :) bash away but atleast i wasnt physically cheating on dh and only i know about it. the question is why dont i feel as bad as i thought i should?