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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Seriously?? "DONT give him meds!!" (EDIT #2!!!))) (EDIT*****)

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

My kindergartner is being evaluated for ADHD on Thursday. He struggles greatly at school to be attentive and is extremely impulsive, to the point he has gotten hurt. Just last Friday he took off during recess and fell on some pavement in a roped off area and got a concussion. He cannot sit still, he always needs to be fidgeting or changing postitions. Academically he is showing improvements, but he needs an aide to help him stay on task and to follow instructions, he has an awful time paying attention, etc. He is such a love, very outgoing and happy, has a great time at school, but he struggles both at school and at home with following directions and impulsiveness, and unfortunately its hard on all of us, especially him.

Long story short is, I mentioned casually to my sister that he was going for the eval on Thursday, and her immediate reaction was, "YOU CANNOT GIVE HIM MEDS!!". She went on to say they are bad for kids, they dont help, and that it is sad that parents medicate their kids. She doesnt even have kids.

Wtf? I dont even know for sure if he does have ADHD yet (even though our doctor said she would be amazed if it was negative), and she's freaking out over giving him medications, without even asking what kind of a plan we might even have for him! DH and I have already discussed trying dietary changes and behavioral changes if we can help, and we are not opposed at all to giving him a medication that might help him thrive. The point is we dont want to hold him back by not helping him, kwim? And she all of a sudden is breathing down my neck about it being "bad"...

Grrrrr. Whats your take on ADHD meds? Did you decide to give them? Did you decide against them?

 

EDIT**** I just wanted to say thank you to all the moms here who had something helpful to say, whether they chose to medicate or not. Its not a decision we face lightly, and we want to be prepared for the eventuality of having to choose what to do.

To the people (few) who had nothing nice to say- well, take your rudeness elsewhere. I need constructive ideas and thoughts to decide how to help my child thrive. Criticizing my parenting when you are a complete inernet stranger does absolutely nothing and is not helpful at all.. (;

Also, a little info I forgot to include in my OP:

DS is seven, he turned 7 in December. He repeated preschool before moving up to prek and was not ready for kindergarten until this year. He has been on an IEP since his second year of preschool. He has received OT and has had a classroom aide since his IEP began and he attends summer sessions as well. He has always received evals that include his inability to attend (that means can not pay attention), impulsiveness, and inability to sit still when appropriate. Without the teachers he has had I dont even want to know where we would be, they have been amazing and have helped him/us tremendously, so this isnt a situation where he has teachers or parents who "just dont want to deal with him".

At this point, with proper evaluation of course, medication is on the table as a possibility. DS is impulsive to the point he has gotten hurt, he gets in trouble on the bus and it has become a safety issue. and we dont want to see him fall further and further behind- the grades will only get more and more challenging. Some people may think a kindergartner is too young for this, but with his age and the consideration of the fact that school will only get more and more challenging, we want to be proactive. We dont want to hold back on doing something that will only help DS be more of the amazing little boy he is.

Hope that all makes sense, sorry this got really long!!!

 

EDIT #2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am completely blown away with all the responses I have gotten about this! Thank you to everyone who has responded, whatever choice you have made or would make about how to treat your child for this. I know its a very personal decision and it is not one we are making lightly. I'm fortunate to have a great pediatrician for our son who is helping us down this road and his eval went very well, considering the fact that DS couldnt even bear to sit still while we were in the Ped's office! Our ped actually has ADD himself, which was a huge plus for our DH to hear. He is not quick to prescribe medication, all though in our case we are ahead of many of the steps he would usually suggest first (like, IEP or 504 plans at school, responsibility charts, etc, to help him through the day, etc etc). I just wanted to say thank you and I am very encouraged to hear how many of your children have truly thrived either because of their ADHD medication or that they have thrived without it as well. THANK YOU EVERYONE!!!!!!

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 1, 2014 at 12:50 PM
Replies (21-30):
caito
by Ruby Member on Apr. 1, 2014 at 12:58 PM

Some people are terrified of meds. I've had people tell me I should have tried dietary changes for my daughter's thyroid disease, instead of going straight to meds. Um, no.

Mazie0723
by Ruby Member on Apr. 1, 2014 at 12:58 PM
I am curious what oils would possibly help? Im not being snarky I really want to know.

Quoting kmorales7690: Have you tried essential oils?
almburr
by Platinum Member on Apr. 1, 2014 at 12:59 PM
Yes as a last resort. So many jump the gun and medicate. They want instant results. I am not saying All I am saying MANY.

So many kids are overstimulated with electronics. ADHD kids need less of these.

Quoting Anonymous: I think they are fine as an absolute last resort. But I don't believe in giving meds unless you have already tried changing his diet, upping his exercise and implementing a proper rewards system. Which most people don't.
karene999
by Member on Apr. 1, 2014 at 12:59 PM

Tell your sister if she can't be supportive to shut the hell up. If you and the Doctor agree that he needs to be on meds then do it.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 9 on Apr. 1, 2014 at 12:59 PM

I agree with your sister. Try other methods first, please.

superwoman8977
by Gold Member on Apr. 1, 2014 at 12:59 PM
Don't do meds!!! Get your child on a schedule and be on them like white on rice I will never put my child on meds
Anonymous
by Anonymous 10 on Apr. 1, 2014 at 1:00 PM
My kindergartner takes adderol, can't have any food dyes and needs consistent, immediate consequences.
The adderol was a HUGE blessing. Like your kiddo, he had three head injuries at school due in part to the hyperactivity and part to impulsivity.
Done correctly, medication is wonderful.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 11 on Apr. 1, 2014 at 1:00 PM
My 8 year old is on Focalin XR. It really helps her.
Lynette
by on Apr. 1, 2014 at 1:00 PM
I would try diet change first before meds. Meds would be a last resort.
almburr
by Platinum Member on Apr. 1, 2014 at 1:01 PM
1 mom liked this
I personally do not see how you could compare those to ADHD meds. The two you listed is life or death.

Quoting cinnamonkiti:

Ask her if she would have a problem with you giving your child insulin if he was an insulin dependent diabetic, or anti rejection medication if he had a transplant....

If her answer is "Of course not"(which I suspect it would be) then ask her why she has a problem with you medicating your son for an "invisible" disorder, when she wouldn't have a problem medicating for a visible one.

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