Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

ex wants custody spinoff!

Posted by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 10:54 AM
  • 12 Replies

This post was about a women and her ex, her ex decided to move 45 minutes away turns out they went to court mom was awarded custody and father was ordered visitation every weekend.

Apparently the bdad wants the mom to go against the court order and do 50/50. The dad wants the mother to do all the transportation. As well dad lives in a different state. From what I understand if their child were to go stay with dad 50/50 he would have to pay tuition to attend because it's a different state.

Dad is refusing to do any transportation or pay for tuition. So I do not get why this mom is getting ripped to shreds. I agree with her 50/50 in her case would not work. 

by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 10:54 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
hershey6
by Silver Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 10:56 AM
I am a big advocate for 50/50 in a lot of situations- however, her situation is not a good one for 50/50. Seems silly that people think that would be practical
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Apr. 3, 2014 at 10:56 AM

 50/50 and meet halfway. I don't believe a child should be kept from their father and they do need more than every weekend with them. However, I also believe in compromise and the mother should not have to do all the transportation. I also have nothing aganist a dad who wants custody of his children. I actually applaud men who do fight for it.

pinklove0015
by Silver Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 11:00 AM

I am a big advocate for 50/50 as well in certain situations. Some situation's it is not in the best interest for the child. This situation 50/50 is not in the best interest. 

Quoting hershey6: I am a big advocate for 50/50 in a lot of situations- however, her situation is not a good one for 50/50. Seems silly that people think that would be practical


pinklove0015
by Silver Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 11:01 AM

The father doesn't want to transport on the time he has the child. I just do not think it is fair to expect the mother to do all the transportation. This women in the post is by no means withholding the child from his father. 

Quoting Anonymous:

 50/50 and meet halfway. I don't believe a child should be kept from their father and they do need more than every weekend with them. However, I also believe in compromise and the mother should not have to do all the transportation. I also have nothing aganist a dad who wants custody of his children. I actually applaud men who do fight for it.


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Apr. 3, 2014 at 11:07 AM

 

Quoting pinklove0015:

The father doesn't want to transport on the time he has the child. I just do not think it is fair to expect the mother to do all the transportation. This women in the post is by no means withholding the child from his father. 

Quoting Anonymous:

 50/50 and meet halfway. I don't believe a child should be kept from their father and they do need more than every weekend with them. However, I also believe in compromise and the mother should not have to do all the transportation. I also have nothing aganist a dad who wants custody of his children. I actually applaud men who do fight for it.

 

 

hence why i said however. 

SHe shouldn't have to do it ALL but he shouldn't have to do it ALL either.

When people become parents they should learn to compromise. Their poor kid probably feels stuck in the middle and being pulled both directions.

wether she is keeping him from dad or not, to the kid he will feel stuck and like it's all his fault.

that is why i wish couples who split or coparent  should be forced to attend classes on how to handle these things.

Armymom134
by Platinum Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 11:14 AM

 

Quoting Anonymous:

 50/50 and meet halfway. I don't believe a child should be kept from their father and they do need more than every weekend with them. However, I also believe in compromise and the mother should not have to do all the transportation. I also have nothing aganist a dad who wants custody of his children. I actually applaud men who do fight for it.

 Long distance situations like this are not ideal for 50/50 custody, and there are other factors that go into this too, if dad is not willing to share the financial burden then he should not have custody. While I support men being apart of their childrens lives in the end you need to do whats in the best interest of the children and living in two different states half the month and going to two different schools that probably don't share the same curriculum is not whats in those childrens best interest. You have to look at the whole situation because not all are the same so it cannot be a one size fits all answer.

 

pinklove0015
by Silver Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 11:33 AM

From what I read she is in no way keeping this child from his father. 

Quoting Anonymous:

 

Quoting pinklove0015:

The father doesn't want to transport on the time he has the child. I just do not think it is fair to expect the mother to do all the transportation. This women in the post is by no means withholding the child from his father. 

Quoting Anonymous:

 50/50 and meet halfway. I don't believe a child should be kept from their father and they do need more than every weekend with them. However, I also believe in compromise and the mother should not have to do all the transportation. I also have nothing aganist a dad who wants custody of his children. I actually applaud men who do fight for it.


 

hence why i said however. 

SHe shouldn't have to do it ALL but he shouldn't have to do it ALL either.

When people become parents they should learn to compromise. Their poor kid probably feels stuck in the middle and being pulled both directions.

wether she is keeping him from dad or not, to the kid he will feel stuck and like it's all his fault.

that is why i wish couples who split or coparent  should be forced to attend classes on how to handle these things.


pinklove0015
by Silver Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 11:35 AM

I am all for 50/50 and am very supportive of 50/50 but the fact that they live in different states will not work for the child. The OP says that the father is the one who moved. In my opinion if he wanted 50/50 he should have stayed in their child's location.

It sounds like this father wants mom to be responsible for everything. 

Quoting Armymom134:


Quoting Anonymous:

 50/50 and meet halfway. I don't believe a child should be kept from their father and they do need more than every weekend with them. However, I also believe in compromise and the mother should not have to do all the transportation. I also have nothing aganist a dad who wants custody of his children. I actually applaud men who do fight for it.

 Long distance situations like this are not ideal for 50/50 custody, and there are other factors that go into this too, if dad is not willing to share the financial burden then he should not have custody. While I support men being apart of their childrens lives in the end you need to do whats in the best interest of the children and living in two different states half the month and going to two different schools that probably don't share the same curriculum is not whats in those childrens best interest. You have to look at the whole situation because not all are the same so it cannot be a one size fits all answer.



Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 3, 2014 at 11:37 AM

I believe she is getting ripped a part by stepmothers who feel their husband's got screwed.

As for the OP of that post. She has said, the father DOES see his child. He gets EVERY weekend and every other Holidays and she even splits HER Holidays with him. If he wants to see his child even more than he should be the one to move back to the same town he left. It sounds like the father wants full custody, because of money issues. Maybe, claiming him on taxes/getting out of paying his 39 bucks a week CS, gas money driving the child to and from....I do not believe he wants custody because he wants more time with his child.

goldpandora
by Platinum Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 11:40 AM

It's my view that you should stick to the CO when there is one and if you want it changed you go back to court.

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)