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Well, my first daycare experience sucked.

Posted by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:17 PM
  • 62 Replies

We started three weeks ago due to me going from part time to full time and my mother not being able to handle my very active and mischeivous 11 month old... it was the last thing i wanted to do.

I researched all the facilities with open slots within reasonable driving distance and settled on one right up the road. Did my due diligence, talked to people, read reviews online, etc. Asked a million and one questions of the director (and those of you who know me here know I've been in the childcare industry myself for 15 years, included directing a large preschool for 3 seasons) so I knew exactly what to look for.

Everything seemed kosher.

Of course my daughter flipped out and screamed the first couple days, i cried, she cried, we were all miserable, etc. It's to be expected.

Then I went to visit unnanounced one day to observe thru the one way glass.

My daughter was sitting in her crib, staring in to space, not sleeping, not naptime, etc. And they left her there, and left her there, and left her there. She eventually stood up and held out her hands to be picked up and cried... and they left her. I finally couldn't stand it anymore and walked in the room... oh my god did they run over to her crib and lift her out faster than a speeding bullet.

First red flag.

Second red flag: Bottles being given to babies to feed themselves IN their cribs (illegal in NYS), and one of the teaches lifted a child out who was crying in his crib rather harshly by the ends of his hands (hello??!) and set him on the floor, still screaming, and walked away. I said "Gee, little guy must be having a tough day?" And she rolled her eyes and said "He ALWAYS has a tough day."

Second red flag.

This morning when I went to drop her off, I noticed that the only books in the room are in a cardboard box behind a gate in the changing area, not accessible to the kids. I have NEVER seen a book on the floor. I have a feeling they don't use them at all, and she LOVES books. This makes me sad. Then, they pulled a high chair out for her to sit in for breakfast and as I was placing her in it, I noticed it was filthy with crumbs and grime (obviously not bleach-watered or sanitized from the day before since it was first thing in the morning)

Then I called to check on her and they always say "She's great, she's fine, no crying at all!" and my mother has gone twice unannounced to check on her during the day and observe through the window... both times, she was sitting on the floor crying and no one was paying attention.

I am BEYOND uncomfortable leaving her there, I have noticed her behavior has changed markedly over the last few weeks.. she is suddenly super clingy (yes, she doesn't see me all day, understandable to a degree) but when my mother had her she wasn't like this.

I'm heartbroken and started researching some alternatives right away... then started to feel morally guilty and maybe as though I'm being unreasonable.

Please feel free to share any experiences or advice. Many thanks!

by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:17 PM
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Replies (1-10):
peanutsmommy1
by Ruby Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:19 PM
2 moms liked this
I would have pulled her after the first red flag
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:20 PM
Yea I would of picked her up that day and never went back. Find a new center.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:20 PM
1 mom liked this
You are not over reacting and I pwuld be looking for another daycare. It's stories like this that make me afraid to put my two youngest in daycare.
Thelmama
by Ruby Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:21 PM
3 moms liked this

I would move her as soon as I could. Moms should always trust their gut when it comes to daycare. There are good ones and bad ones. Some that just don't fit with a particular child.  Do what you think, you need to do.  You are not being unreasonable. If your gut says something is wrong, trust it.

SouthTxPrincess
by Silver Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:21 PM
Im sorry mama that has to be rough, im a sahm and have never have had to go through this but if you feel uncomfortable pull her and find a different one. Will your mom watch her for a few days or a week while you look into a new daycare? Can you report any of this? I hope it all works out.
Nolanzo
by Silver Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:22 PM

 That would be lovely if I had ANY other alternative at ALL for childcare, which I do not. Mom is in Florida for the month of April, and I've registered her at another center already but the slot doesn't open up for two weeks. I'll be damned if I'd hire a stranger to come in to my home to watch her after seeing all that shit on TV about nannies throwing kids around on surveillance cameras. Hell no.

I don't know what to do! I cannot afford to take off even a day. Sigh.

Quoting peanutsmommy1: I would have pulled her after the first red flag

 

AZHOTMOM
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:22 PM

I never did daycare, I was blessed that DH and I had opposite work schedules at the time. But what about a home daycare? My neighbor has one and she is soooo awesome with kids. They are never in a crib except to sleep, she plays with them down on the floor and has the patience of a saint.

Lostinindy
by Platinum Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:22 PM
1 mom liked this
I would pull her. You have more then enough reasons.
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embrigmom
by Platinum Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:22 PM
1 mom liked this

I worked in child care for years as well and all of that is throwing major red flags for me as well. I would not only pull her out of that day care I would report them.

JoanahLee
by Platinum Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 4:23 PM
1 mom liked this

Anyway you can go back to part time? Other folks might not agree with me, but unless you get super lucky thats kind of what day care is like.  They do better and worse jobs of mediocre childcare, but anywhere ive found, short of the Montessori school, is substandard.  Even the preschool/daycare we use now... they are wonderful, the baby gets held a lot, they have plenty of staff, its always clean, but there are still things that make me cringe on a regular basis. 

Theres no place like home! 

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