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did your husband cheat? how did you forgive & forget?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 12 Replies

My DH (who was then my boyfriend) had an 'emotional' affair in the summer of 2008. He was talking to several girls via text and was sending and recieving naked pictures.. I found out and left, was heartbroken but decided to work on it because I had a almost 3 year old child and dh had been in his life for 2 years.

When this happened, all dh could say is 'we aren't happy' well... I was fine. Nothing had changed. His other excuse was 'I have a girlfriend that goes to bed at 8:30' I then had to be to work at 4am. 

Since then, things have gone okay. But I am always leery when he adds some random girl on facebook that I have no clue who she is, or when he leaves the room to talk on his phone, or if I walk in and hes texting and he moves the screen where I can't see.

Idk, maybe I am being paranoid. I brought it up today about him having girls on his facebook... and he got pissed off told me I was stupid, and that I was turning something into nothing. I feel bad always thinking the worst about him but I don't know what to do to make it where I don't think of this everytime I turn around.


any advice? 

Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 3, 2014 at 6:11 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 3, 2014 at 6:19 PM

bump


firespurity
by Emerald Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 6:20 PM
Well he called you stupid. That's a red flag
lisairv
by Platinum Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 6:23 PM

You don't! You dump his ass and move on. 

Snapdragon88
by Ruby Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 6:26 PM
If he really wanted you to trust him, he wouldn't be engaging in suspicious behavior.

I think he's still at it, hun. I'm sorry.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Apr. 3, 2014 at 6:50 PM
You would this much later?

Quoting lisairv:

You don't! You dump his ass and move on. 

MonarchMom22
by Bronze Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 6:56 PM

You don't sound at peace and comfortable in the relationship.  if things haven't gotten better in the last 6 years, what is going to change to make it better?

Personally, I think any adult who needs to name call or argue about what is on their FB page is not ready for a committed relationship.  

Your instinct is telling you he is not being truthful.  That is why you can't move on and forget.

I would ask to go to counseling.  You don't want to go 6 more years, still feel insecure, and then say why did I stay so long.

Zombie_Mombie
by on Apr. 3, 2014 at 6:57 PM
Sounds like he is still cheating on you. I did the same before we got married... :/

But! I changed my phone number and deleted everyone off my Facebook besides my good friends and gave him my password. He can use my phone whenever. He never checks my Facebook or uses my phone because he trusts me. I also am not doing anything wrong so if he wanted it he could have it.


Sounds like he is still cheating on you. Getting upset is a big red flag. He should understand and reassure you not put you down.

I would leave...

As Dr. Phil says, "there is only 1 thing worse then being in a bad relationship for one year, and that is being in a bad relationship for 1 year and 1 day."

Do you wanna look back next year and still live in fear of him cheating? Constantly feeling like you're not good enough? If this how you want to live your life? Is this what you want for your daughter?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 3, 2014 at 7:00 PM
Ok!
First, cheating doesn't mean divorce. I think it's worse physical abuse.
People are so lazy today. Oh he cheat on me. I leave.
If you really love a man. Try to make an effort. It's a marriage. It's sacred.
It hurts, but most of the women get depressed and start fighting and get fat!
Take care of yourself and show him why he choose you after all you are the wife! He conquered you, then show him why!

Instead of complaining in your house and crying. Step up ladies. If u love your husband, man or boyfriend. At least make an effort!
And never confront a mistress. Learn to behave like a lady.
Miller0305
by Platinum Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 7:04 PM
1 mom liked this

This. You never should have married him OP. He doesn't respect you. 

Quoting lisairv:

You don't! You dump his ass and move on. 


lisairv
by Platinum Member on Apr. 3, 2014 at 7:08 PM

I would have to begin with but I still would do it now. He has no respect for you.

Quoting Anonymous: You would this much later?
Quoting lisairv:

You don't! You dump his ass and move on. 


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