Let me start by saying we live in a town home. It's 4 bedroom/3 bath. It's like a very large apartment. Plenty of room, and I think they're well insulated. It's also in a very nice area of town. I like living here but sometimes I feel like I live among the upper crust as far as condos and apartments go and that's not always a good thing. People here are very uptight and snooty (is that a word?).
Our neighbors just knocked on our door. They have one side of their home that attaches to one of our sides. We never hear them except on rare occasion when we are in the master bath. Basically we can just hear faint voices if they happen to be near that sound of the house when we are in our bathroom. That seems to be the only time we even would know we had neighbors. The master baths attach to the master bedrooms. We are parents in our early 30's, with 3 kids. They are probably in their 50's (I'd guess) with 3 adult kids living at home. Maybe in the 18-24 age range. They say they need to talk so we invite them in. I'm not sure which religion they are but they don't cut their hair (the women), they always wear long skirts, etc. We are Christians at the Church of God and it's a very liberal and lose church. Anyway, so it's just the mom and Dad.
They sit down and immediately they say they appreciate how clean we keep things, how good we are at being courteous neighbors and how they never really have any complaints about us. They compliment us on our children and their behavior. They then ask to make sure the kids are in bed and they say, "Look, this is hard for us to say but we but we hear you guys having sexual intercourse on an, almost, nightly basis. It's the only time we hear you at all. We hear the neighbors on the other side arguing, their kids running wild and such. We never hear those things with you all and we appreciate that. We just hear the sex. We think you're an adorable family, you're an attractive married couple who takes good care of their kids and we get it, we were younger and thinner at once (they're both very heavy set but not sure what the hell that has to do with it) and we understand the enjoyment but it gets old, every night. I mean you guys are like animals and you go for hours at times. We hear the screaming, the headboard hitting the wall over and over, we can even tell when the two of you climax. While this is a very uncomfortable conversation, we've got to find a solution." Then they ask us how long we've been married, we tell them for 15 years. So they say, "that throws the newlywed theory out." Ok.., yes we've been married for a while now but are we not supposed to enjoy having sex with one another?? We still enjoy it very much! We apologize and say that we'll try to keep it down. The whole time I'm thinking how can we really be that loud? We aren't loud enough to wake our kids. We aren't louder than the average couple, I wouldn't think, but I did feel bad for the way they described it and the times of night (in longer continued conversation than I will bore you with here) were dead on, so I know they are telling the truth. They've only lived here a couple months, but why didn't they say something sooner??
Then he says this as they're leaving, "Look you two, it's at a point that we are actually aroused by it and when I get that way I have to awaken my wife to pleasure me at the thought of your wife, and same for her with your husband. We are commiting sin by lustful thoughts of you guys." WTF!? My husband told him he really didn't appreciate that remark in particular, but nonetheless... we were truly sorry for disturbing them and then he showed them out. I'm creeped out!