I'm having an abortion tomorrow ..UPDATE 3.5 months
I know this is posted everyday.. But even though I'm confident with this choice I'm still scared. . I'm pretty alone in all this. . I'm going by myself. .I'm just ready to get it over with. It's been a tough few weeks. I've been so so sick in and out of the er bc I've been vomiting so much. Terrible. How long does it take for pregnancy symptoms to go away after an abortion? Crazzzzy.
It's been 2.5 weeks... Today was my last day of clinicals..I feel awesome..I still stand behind my choice and I'm still confident it was the best..I had a hard time during the first week.. But I made it through.. Never had to make myself so motivated but I did it..I have 2 more weeks of class then I'll graduate.. I'm so proud of myself.. Thank you every one for your support! !!
3.5 months later
Its been 3.5 months since my abortion.. Its been a long road with many different emotions. The guy that had gotten me pregnant came back around and broke down crying about how we shouldnt have done this, and it really did make me doubt my decision. .. but it didnt take long for him to reassure me why I made the hard choice I had to make in the first place and decided that I did this so that I (as well as my kids) wouldnt be tied down with all his crazy baggage that would do nothing but keep me from providing the life I want for my two kids so I cut him out for good. While I know my choice was right I still have a hard time coping with things that remind me of my pregnancy... people posting baby bumps on facebook, baby clothes, babies theirselves... it makes me sad but I know it just wasnt the right time with the right person. I have a therapist that I talk to about it, and that helps as well. It really was a life changing event, and while it may have been one of the darkest times of my life and sometimes I still struggle with it I am happy where I am mentally. I graduated from nursing school, taking my boards on Monday, waiting to hear back from a job offering 17 an hour in a GI clinic, thinking about how far I have come in just a few short months from such a dark time in my life is what gets me through.. no matter what I will always feel a sense of loss, but its about using that to become a better person.
Im really open about my abortion, Im not sure why. I really dont have a problem sharing my story with anyon e really... I dont walk up to random strangers or anything, but a lot of my aquaintances know about it... Im not sure if thats healthy, or normal or whatever or why I even do it.. I think it helps me get it off my chest, I am not a very secretive person at all..I like people to know my story so they know why I am the way I am..I guess? Im not sure... What do other Moms that have had aboritons feel about this? Even if you havent had an abortion, how would you feel if you saw someone you hadnt seen in awhile, and a related topic came up and she told you about this? I dont know... I feel like I talk about it, but then after its over with I hit myself over the head because I know its such a sensitive subject..