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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

charging mil for rides

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 99 Replies
My mil is always nagging me and dh to drive her around. She never learned to drive and as fil is a truck driver, he is often out of town. Dh works full time and we have 3 kids and I'm pregnant. Obviously, I am very busy and don't have time to drive mil around. She lives 30 minutes away so just to take her to the grocery store 2 miles away from her, I have to spend an hour driving in addition to waiting for her to do her shopping. It also means at least $10 worth of gas. I told her that i would start charging her. This is because 1. It costs money and my time to drive her and 2. It will likely limit the amount she asks if she knows it will cost her say $20 every time. She actually got mad at me. Dh agreed with me since he has been working more and understands that driving his mother around falls mostly on me. My other option is to limit driving her to once a week or possibly not doing it at all. I also told her that for the first 6 weeks after the baby is born, i wont be driving her at all. She got even more angry then and said i dont understand what family is about (apparently family is about catering to her). What do you think?
Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 19, 2014 at 1:04 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 19, 2014 at 1:04 AM

BUMP!

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 19, 2014 at 1:05 AM

BUMP!

bluebunnybabe
by Ruby Member on Apr. 19, 2014 at 1:07 AM
1 mom liked this
I probably wouldn't charge but would just do the other option of once per week & not at all for the six weeks after you have your baby.
kikibix
by Platinum Member on Apr. 19, 2014 at 1:08 AM
3 moms liked this

Tell her to take a cab, a bus or to make friends with her neighbours.  Ridiculous for a grown up to be asking for or even worse, expecting, rides.  What did she do all those years before you came along or her kids were old enough to drive? If you were less then 5 minutes away I could understand her leaning on you occassionally but you are half an hour away, that's a lot of time out of your life.  Just say no.

Meladonis
by Member on Apr. 19, 2014 at 1:08 AM

I would just stop driving her. If she needs to go somewhere she can walk, use public transportation,call a cab,have a close friend drive her, or she can take the time and learn how to drive.

fullxbusymom
by Ruby Member on Apr. 19, 2014 at 1:08 AM
1 mom liked this

I would offer to do it once a week for her and no I would never charge my husbands parents or mine.  I drove 45mins once a week to do all my grandmothers errands and drive her to and from hair appts.  I can't even imagine charging her for them, this is what families do for each other.  It isn't like she has any other options. 

DragonInfinity
by Gold Member on Apr. 19, 2014 at 1:09 AM

 So glad my MIL isn't like that.

But if she was, I would be doing the exact same thing you are thinking of doing! At least she is being driven, if not by you she would have to  pay for someone to come pick her up, etc...

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 19, 2014 at 1:10 AM
Quoting kikibix:

Tell her to take a cab, a bus or to make friends with her neighbours.  Ridiculous for a grown up to be asking for or even worse, expecting, rides.  What did she do all those years before you came along or her kids were old enough to drive? If you were less then 5 minutes away I could understand her leaning on you occassionally but you are half an hour away, that's a lot of time out of your life.  Just say no.

They lived in NYC so she didn't need to drive
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Apr. 19, 2014 at 1:11 AM
I wouldn't charge, I would try to do it once a week.

Personal I think she is lonely.
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Apr. 19, 2014 at 1:12 AM
Quoting fullxbusymom:

I would offer to do it once a week for her and no I would never charge my husbands parents or mine.  I drove 45mins once a week to do all my grandmothers errands and drive her to and from hair appts.  I can't even imagine charging her for them, this is what families do for each other.  It isn't like she has any other options. 

She doesn't have any other options because she has been too lazy to learn how to drive. And she asks me 3-4 times a week when fil is out of town
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