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Am I a prude?????

Posted by Anonymous
  • 47 Replies
So I've been talking to this guy for months now but just for the last 2 months we've actually been hanging out and stuff. We had sex once and after that I've spent the night with him a few times but didn't want to have sex. So he's 'jokingly' saying I'm a prude!! Lol is that being a prude!? I felt like I rushed it when we had sex the first time and I usually prefer to be actually bf/gf to be having sex anyways that's why I didn't want to anymore.
Posted by Anonymous on Apr. 26, 2014 at 12:24 AM
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Replies (1-10):
by expecto patronum on Apr. 26, 2014 at 12:25 AM
Why'd you give it up if you don't want to again? Did he suck at it?
by Anonymous 2 on Apr. 26, 2014 at 12:26 AM
Well, I prefer to be married before sex, so no you're not a prude.
by Anonymous 3 on Apr. 26, 2014 at 12:27 AM
Doesn't sound like you're into him enough. Move on.
by on Apr. 26, 2014 at 12:28 AM
... I feel Iike I am a broken record but I don't "wait" to have set. Period. I have sex when I WANT to.
by Platinum Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 12:31 AM
If you don't want to, don't. It's your body and your decision.
I fully understand wanting to have a solid relationship before having sex.
You already did once so I think you need some soul searching an to talk to him
by Emerald Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 12:34 AM
Because she wants a commitment before having a regular sexual relationship lol?

Quoting Anonymous: Doesn't sound like you're into him enough. Move on.
by Anonymous 4 on Apr. 26, 2014 at 12:40 AM
I don't think you're a prude, and he shouldn't be pressing the issue. DH and I met on a night we were both trashed from drinking. I invited him to come home with me. He was more than willing but had his head on straight enough to keep asking if I was sure and each step he'd ask "Are you Sure you want to do this?" It was the first "one night stand" either of us had ever had. I'd only been with on guy and DH had been with several girls (he's 7 years older than me) but no sex on the first date ever plus this wasn't even a date. We were at a party with mutual friends. We'd never met before. What I thought would be a one night stand ended up to be more. When he left the next morning he made sure to get my number and he called me the next day for a real date. The sex was amazing but I felt ashamed because I didn't even know him and he figured I probably thought that was a regular thing for him when it was not. We agreed, on that first real date, that we'd like to start seeing each other but I asked him if we could not have sex again for a while until we got to know each other and he said he understood and that he too wanted me to know he was not "that" guy and that he respected me. He also had said had he not been just as drunk as me, he wouldn't have done it that might. Not because he didn't want to but because I was so trashed and had he not been he might have thought sleeping with a drunk girl was a bad judgement call. He wouldn't take advantage of that situation. It was hard. We would fool around if it got to be too hard to resist and get hot and heavy but somehow once of use would reluctantly muster up the will power to remind both of us that we were waiting. He never pressed the issue or teased me because he knew it was important to me and I needed to know he cared about more than just the amazing sex. I called the shots on this subject. He said he wanted to but respected my choice and would wait as long as needed but that temptation was extremely hard. 5 months later when I felt we had really spent quality time together and gotten to know one another better (we spent every minute of every day together except while at work) we started having sex again, and it was just as amazing and well worth the wait! We got married 18 months later and this June we celebrate 17 years of a wonderful, strong, and happy marriage.
by Ruby Member on Apr. 26, 2014 at 12:42 AM

Don't allow others, including yourself, to put labels on you for being in control of your sex life.  YOU decide when you feel comfortable having sex (as long as the other is willing too, of course).

by Anonymous 5 on Apr. 26, 2014 at 12:44 AM

Having sex with a guy you have no committment to is the opposite of a prude. Changing your mind and realizing that also does not make you a prude, it means that you wish to be more discerning in the future. 

by Sarah on Apr. 26, 2014 at 12:55 AM
2 moms liked this

 I dont think it has anything to do with being a prude, if you dont want to do it you dont, I would explain to him exactly what you just stated here, you feel like it was a rush etc the first time and that you would rather be in a committed situation etc, if he doesnt like it, oh well, moving on......

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