He's never had an opinion before, but now that he does I'm supposed to blindly accept it?
Is anyone else's husband like this? It drives me CRAZY!!
My husband rarely has a say when it comes to most parental decisions. It's not my choice, I'm always trying to involve him, but he is more than happy to let me make the calls. Which is fine...until he decides he wants to have an opinion. Then, as soon as he has that opinion, I'm expected to just drop all of my feelings on the subject and submit to it. Well...I'm tired of it. No more.
For example: we have been with the same daycare provider for 2 years now. Our daughters love her. She is the best provider we've ever had. She makes amazing, well-balanced, home-cooked meals for the kids. She takes them to fun activities, and is always making cute and fun crafts with them. And she's not just great for the kids - she's awesome for me to work with. If I'm late on payment (only happened once) she doesn't mind at all. She never calls off, so she's very reliable. (Well, she has called off once or twice for appointments and such, but she let me know at least a month in advance so I could plan accordingly.) And her fee is very reasonable - moreso than any other daycare around. She charges by the day instead of the week, so I can save major money by DH keeping the kids on his days off (Wednesdays, and every other Thursday - I save $240 a month!). There are just so many things that make her a wonderful daycare provider. I'm so glad we found her.
But last week, our youngest came home with a scratch on her leg from the daycare provider's cat. It was one scratch - kind of long, but not deep at all. Now all of a sudden SO wants to find another daycare. I'm not nuts about our kid getting scratched, but shit happens. The provider said that she thought the cat was in the basement, but someone must have let it out, because she usually doesn't let it roam the house free during business hours. No big deal, it happens, she apologized, it won't happen again. But DH just will NOT let it go! He's always telling me about new providers he's heard about, or approaching them himself and asking if they have openings. It makes me so mad - he never asked how I felt - he's just decided we need to switch and that's it. Especially because it's my income that pays for daycare. He pays other bills, we keep our money separate because that's what works for us. I'm not okay with having to pay more for daycare when I'm perfectly happy with the one we have now. If he was paying for it, it *might* be a different story.
He has never cared about daycare before, not at all. I chose the provider, interviewed her, vetted her, and I pay her. He's never had an opinion on the subject before now. I'm not going to switch to another provider over a cat scratch - especially not when this provider is so good. And the money is an issue too, because anywhere else it would cost more. And what if we moved and the new provider wasn't as good? I'd be paying more money for lesser care. I'm just not willing to risk it.
So DH is giving me the silent treatment now. Usually in instances like this I cave. But for once, I felt strongly enough to stand up and say no. I refused to accept it. He doesn't get to step in now and make such a big and final decision without my say, when he's never cared one bit about it before. And now he's acting like a petulant child. *sigh*
If you read this far, thanks for listening to my vent. Sometimes it's nice to be able to come to CM and just let it all out.