ETA*Should they just be forced to stop having children? What do You think should be done?
This is just one of those post where I feel there is a problem and wanna talk about it , but of course--nothing can really be done :-) Just something,that from time to time,gets my hackles up.
I'm sure some will bash & Many will agree. Another post earlier,caused me to bring it up in reply & got me thinking about it all over again.
Ok, In Alaska, I knew a few people ,who constantly had me and a few family members and friends saying "WHY Does the state keep letting them have kids to just get taken away or abused etc...all over again?"
#1 story -- this girl ,she's got 4 kids (last time I knew)
She's mentally disabled, but not to the point where people look at her and can SEE It, you gotta know her a little to catch on & it's not so bad that she can't find a man. However, it very ,very much affects her parenting and life. She got her first two taken away and the court said she wasn't mentally competent to care for children. Ok, you'd think it would make the state either force a tubal tie, regualar depo shots or IUD or something more than condoms or Pills that she can forget etc.. but nope...so she loses the first two kids for GOOD REASON and then gets knocked up again (( mind you--the 1st two came out with mental problems as well-much worse than hers,as she did drugs/drank while pregnant on top of the gentics)) and this baby comes out with problems as well. They don't take this child at birth, nope they say she has to do something wrong - AFTER the court taking two away and saying she was mentally incompetent to raise children!! So, she loses this one for neglect and child endangerment. Gets proven unfit by the court. Has another one and again this happens. Failure to thrive, mental and physical diabilities in the child again. Four babies. State does nothing to make her stop having children.Doesn't take them at birth. Lets her keep them until something Happens to the child. What happens when she leaves a baby or toddler with someone and they beat or rape or both? Or kills them? She leaves them with everyone. All kinds of SUPER Nasty druggies and creeps and men etc...
#2 story-- Lady I know VERY Well. 5 kids. 5 different dads. She's got some VERY serious mental issues but isn't slow or anything. She's the type of mom where all five kids are dirty and stinky and never have any clothes that fit or look decent EVER . The toddler boys have on the oldest girls GIRLY shoes that are way too big and they always have a gazillion pets and the home is dirty and stinky and they do whatever they want and have foul mouths and all act like satan worshipers ( I mean that) they think it's funny. Now--the problem. The mom always has the newest high tech cell phones and her smokes and guitars and amps and her nice vehicle and she's always online and got all her gadgets. The kids always look HORRIBLE. Terrible messy hair and the kids on the bus make fun of them ( I know because my nephews and children ride on the bus with them :-( ) she has actually given the kids over to the state while she couldn't care for them before and then worked years to get them back and then repeated all the mistakes and then some. She's on pills and never stopped. She always ,always,always ignores them and talkes horrible about them. He gay friend is making it VERY Well known he's interested in her 8 year old son and she laughs over it thinking it's funny.
Story #3 Is almost exactly like #2. Minus the drugs and add some knocking the kids around to it.
#4 -- mom with a 10 year old boy a newborn twins--- she never took care of him and lets him around a ton of drugs and then has twins and makes him do ALLLLLL Of the care. ALL of it. EVERYthing. For her, the dad and the twins and himself. EVERYTHING. Runs the entire home himself. Poor kid. Ugh.
#5-- kids in a HORRIBLE home situation. Later on the dad blew his head off in the front room on the little girls birthday which happened to be fathers day that year and I'd been calling CPS like crazy and so had a few neighbors all summer long and they still didn't take the kids and then finally--the kids missed school 4 times in one week after missing almost 2 weeks of school in the first 3 months of school -- so they took them away FOR THAT !!!!
My cousin--- tried for years to get pregnant. GREAT family life and income and home. Years of fertility treatments. Stopped them and finally got pregnant .GREAT Mom and family and support system. She's amazing. Her whole family has a history of MAJORLY brittle bones. Her and her family have a huge history of babies,toddlers and kids all having Broken bones. Her son gets a fractured arm at 5 months old and they wouldn't let her or her husband near him at the hospital and made her mom and dad stay with them for weeks afterwards while an investigation is being done.
WHY do these people keep getting their kids given back to them?
WHY are they allowed to keep having more?
WHEN will the parents who do one small thing or have a false accusation and get their kids taken away forever---stop having this happen to them and the ones doing all this actually get them taken away like they should? I Don't understand
I just don't get it.
Not my place to judge , I know. I just can't help but not be able to stand it anymore
ETA* To those commenting on letting the government sterilize and take so much control etc...
I do agree, however, what about all those babies being born with numerous disabilities, just to be shoved into a world of misery and mistreatment? To further be shoved into foster care? What about them & the extended family that it hurts? I guess there's just no win in these situations
Also - to sterilize is to Forever remove ANY and ALL chances of having a child. A hysterectomy etc...
I never suggested anything of the sort :-)
Tubal ties are undone all the time -very sucesfully. If the woman later on becomes more stable or whatever--untie them. If she can't afford the $6000 to untie them,she probably can't afford a child either.
Also, I listed The shot and IUD as well :-) Please, don't single out one thing out of an entire list and huge long post .