So there, I said it...I really am not enjoying it at all. I breastfed my first daughter for only 6 weeks, we had lots of issues so I stopped. So with this baby I was very determined. She is now 6 weeks, and I am sitting here hating breastfeeding but I don't know what to do...I want to give her the best food, I want to save the money from buying formula when I can make something better for free, I want to have that bond...but honestly it just sucks! My dh started a new position at work so he is only home and awake about three hours a day, and I also have a three year old. She is a handful by herself, and sitting for at least six hours a day to feed this baby is just not working! I'm not getting any sleep, and now I'm trying to pump because I will be going back to work soon, but I can't pump while she's eating because she squirms a lot, and if my toddler needs something I need to be able to get it for her or help her with it, so I need the other hand. So that leaves me pumping after she eats, so now that's more time spent on this. I don't want to sit and feed her all day long...I want to enjoy the weather, go do things with my girls, I only get so much time to spend when they're little and sitting on the fricken couch feeding and pumping is not how I want to spend it.
I feel so guilty...I feel like I'm giving up, but I'm sitting here weighing my options and thinking that maybe breastfeeding just isn't for me...
alright ladies be nice please. I'm just trying to vent as I sit here with a baby attached to my boob at 3 am. Anyone else feel this way?? What did you do?
edit: Thank you to everyone who responded and helped with advice, or just a thoughtful response. I was suprised at how nice everyone was to be honest but you all made me feel so much better about my situation. I went and talked to my sister, who breastfed her daughter for 18 months, and she helped me a ton. i told her how i felt, she helped me with pumping and support and I decided to continue breastfeeding. I'm so glad that i shared my feelings with her and you ladies. I feel really good about my decision, ad things have been much better in the past week, ive been trying to pu less pressure on myself, and i will take it one day at a time. Thanks ladies!!!!