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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

My daughter won't help out me, her sister and her soon to be born niece :(

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 524 Replies
1 mom liked this
My oldest daughter is 22 and just graduated college. She works full time but with alternating hours. My middle daughter is 17 and is 6 months pregnant, she's a junior with one more year of school left, and she's going to be taking classes at the local college to get a jump start on her degree. My youngest is 15 and a freshman.

My oldest lives on her own, and we're trying to figure out childcare for when the baby gets here. With our schedules, my 15yo and I/my husband can watch the baby 4 days a week. We need my oldest to watch her one day a week.

Today I talked to her about it and she flat out refuses. I kept trying to ask her why, etc, and she finally just exploded "I'm not wasting my time off watching her kid because she's an irresponsible idiot, and I'm annoyed you're paying for her college because she got knocked up when you didn't help at all with mine".

There's no reliable or affordable childcare in our area, and her community college classes go to much better use than pouring money into daycare. We didn't pay for her college because she got a well paying degree at an expensive school, and we wouldn't have been able to afford it.

I was texting her about this and said she wasn't being a good sister. Her response? "Go to hell, mom" and she's not answering texts or her phone now.

Does anyone have any advice? I'm so stressed and overwhelmed and angry at this whole situation.
Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 13, 2014 at 6:19 PM
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Replies (1-10):
couture-mommy
by Ruby Member on Jun. 13, 2014 at 6:20 PM
33 moms liked this
Its not her responsibility.
Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 13, 2014 at 6:20 PM
16 moms liked this
I agree with her.
MilkLover0203
by Platinum Member on Jun. 13, 2014 at 6:21 PM
60 moms liked this
Make sure you have a basket of condoms on the table by the front door for future use, and stop treating your oldest daughter like shit. That baby isn't her responsibility at all. You can't be serious.
B1Bomber
by Platinum Member on Jun. 13, 2014 at 6:21 PM
13 moms liked this

While I disapprove of her concluding comment, I understand her feelings and support her decision. It is not her responsibility to provide childcare, free or otherwise, for her irresponsible teenaged sister (or for anyone else).

hollyandjason
by Bronze Member on Jun. 13, 2014 at 6:21 PM
5 moms liked this
It's not her problem, and she has valid points!
Sorry I agree with your oldest dd!
housecoatloonie
by Bronze Member on Jun. 13, 2014 at 6:21 PM
16 moms liked this

I agree with the 22 year old.

Sure, families should come together, but she isn't obligated to watch her little sister's bastard crotchfruit because she screwed up and got knocked up.

Maybe she'll change her mind after the kid is here, but her sister's teen pregnancy isn't her emergency.

RayneofTerror
by Silver Member on Jun. 13, 2014 at 6:21 PM
25 moms liked this

it isnt her responsibility. and if you help one with college you help all. you treated the oldest one way and are babying the middle child. it also isnr fair to have dd15 do any regualr baby sitting. way to steal her teen years too. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 13, 2014 at 6:22 PM
14 moms liked this
Your treating her unfairly. It's not her responsibility to care for her niece. And you shouldn't force her to. And I'd be mad you didn't even help pay for my college and then turn around and pay for my younger irresponsible sisters college.
Tuned.Out
by Gold Member on Jun. 13, 2014 at 6:22 PM
3 moms liked this

No advice...  I agree with your eldest daughter. It's not her responsibilty to take care of the teen mom's childcare needs.

LAXmom21
by Ruby Member on Jun. 13, 2014 at 6:22 PM
24 moms liked this

 I think I read this once before.....

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