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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

second babies and maternity leave?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 15 Replies

I have two different friends in the childcare business.  One takes care of her niece and another takes care of her friends' kid.  Both just had second babies and one mom is on maternity leave and still brings her daughter two days a week to my friend, the other days she keeps both kids home.  The other one brings her daughter all five days and stays home with just the baby every day.  Same hours.  Does that seem odd to any of you?  I understand a couple days a week, to keep the toddler on her schedule somewhat and to have a few days with just the new baby.  But sending your oldest away every day when you are home with the baby seems a bit harsh.  what do you ladies think?

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 18, 2014 at 11:45 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 18, 2014 at 11:49 AM

BUMP!

Anonymous
by Anonymous on Jun. 18, 2014 at 11:51 AM
I would be worried my child would feel resentment towards the new baby if he got all that time with me while she had to still go to daycare.
ninjakids
by Christina on Jun. 18, 2014 at 11:52 AM
Meh. There's a lot of factors, how great is their support system. When I had yds (2 years between ods and yds) I was breastfeeding and exhausted all the time. So yes, I can totally understand why she would.

Plus, assuming you are in the states where mat leave is 6 weeks, not a big deal. She could be transitioning him into the routine of a new baby without disrupting his routine (which they suggest).
Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 18, 2014 at 11:53 AM

i know.  it just seems unfair

Quoting Anonymous: I would be worried my child would feel resentment towards the new baby if he got all that time with me while she had to still go to daycare.


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jun. 18, 2014 at 11:54 AM

she has three months, then her husband is taking a month off

Quoting ninjakids: Meh. There's a lot of factors, how great is their support system. When I had yds (2 years between ods and yds) I was breastfeeding and exhausted all the time. So yes, I can totally understand why she would. Plus, assuming you are in the states where mat leave is 6 weeks, not a big deal. She could be transitioning him into the routine of a new baby without disrupting his routine (which they suggest).


ninjakids
by Christina on Jun. 18, 2014 at 11:56 AM
Either way, this is the oldest routine. Why disrupt his or her routine? Ods used to get upset when he missed daycare/preschool because he didn't get to pay with his friends.



Quoting Anonymous:

she has three months, then her husband is taking a month off

Quoting ninjakids: Meh. There's a lot of factors, how great is their support system. When I had yds (2 years between ods and yds) I was breastfeeding and exhausted all the time. So yes, I can totally understand why she would.

Plus, assuming you are in the states where mat leave is 6 weeks, not a big deal. She could be transitioning him into the routine of a new baby without disrupting his routine (which they suggest).

owl0210
by Emerald Member on Jun. 18, 2014 at 11:58 AM
I'm home on maternity leave and my son goes to preschool full time. I have to pay regardless and don't want to disrupt his schedule since he is already adjusting to a new sibling but feel free to pay his $10k a year tuition so that I can keep him home and save his spot lol.
Clubpenguin
by Silver Member on Jun. 18, 2014 at 11:58 AM
I agree with keeping the older child home. But my daycare requested I bring my dd back. I was paying for it and they knew she's have a hard time adjusting.
bry36
by Gold Member on Jun. 18, 2014 at 12:01 PM

 I don't think it sounds odd for some people its huge adjustment to add another child to the family and they might need time get a routine down with baby plus be able to rest themselves so they can be the best mommy when they do have both kids. For me I like having my kid at home so I probably wouldn't have done that but maybe a few days a week to keep the child on their normal routine plus to keep them active playing with the other kids ect.We tried to have a second child and I always wanted to have one in Sept or Oct so my oldest would be at school part of the day .

AZHOTMOM
by Platinum Member on Jun. 18, 2014 at 12:03 PM

 I can understand it. Maybe they don't want their toddlers getting out of their routines. A screaming child at the morning drop off isn't fun for anyone. I kept my oldest dd home after I had my second, I wish I wouldn't have. Trying to leave the baby to go back to work and getting her back to her routine was a total nighmare.

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