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One of my worst fears is coming true.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 22 Replies

And I don't know what to do.  Triggering post.

I was molested by an immediate family member from a young age (like, for example I  have memories of being 2 and giving oral sex) until I was about 8.   I am "weird" and don't trust people easily and have anxieties.  For reasons of my safety and my family's safety I never told anyone but therapists and dear friends about what happened.  

I thought he was marrying a woman that wanted to be childless, but then she had been talking about wanting babies but she has issues like PCOS and endometriosis and was told she had a very poor chance of conceiving.

One of my oldest friends told me maybe he's changed.   I mean, WE have changed a lot so why couldn't he change??  

Something about what he did is so terrible, though, I've never done anything so terrible.. I don't really think people who can do that kind to other helpless human beings are capable of changing without being castrated.

Well, yesterday when I get a text that she is going on fertility drugs and if they don't work they will talk IUI and IVF.  So this is real.  She is trying to conceive with my molestor. 

I couldn't sleep last night.  I'm jumpy and a bit of a wreck.  My MIL is in town and I'm in a daze.

I don't know what to do..  If I tell her he is going to come act out a horror movie.  It's not an option.

If I don't tell her...  

Is it possible he wouldn't hurt his own children?   Possible?  Not possible?  

This is an nightmare.

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 29, 2014 at 10:12 AM
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Replies (1-10):
latsyrk
by Gold Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 10:15 AM
Are you concerned he may hurt you? I highly count he's changed, especially without intervention



Doubt not count
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jun. 29, 2014 at 10:18 AM
As a survivor of severe abuse to her father, please tell her. You have to try. Please
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 29, 2014 at 10:19 AM
1 mom liked this
Child molesters do not change. if he abused you then there are others.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jun. 29, 2014 at 10:19 AM
That's tough. I probably would not worry about it until she actually gets pregnant. Was he a child too when this happened?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Jun. 29, 2014 at 10:19 AM
1 mom liked this

Everything is possible. Honestly I would come out with the truth so she at least has a heads up about about her husband. Imagine how you would feel 5 years from now if you said nothing and found out he molested his kid.

bookwormx4
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 10:20 AM
I think you need to talk to someone. They rarely if ever change without serious intervention. *hugs* I understand your fear.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 29, 2014 at 10:21 AM

Yes but he is about 10 years older than I am. 

Quoting Anonymous: That's tough. I probably would not worry about it until she actually gets pregnant. Was he a child too when this happened?


Anonymous
by Anonymous 6 on Jun. 29, 2014 at 10:22 AM
Nope. He hasn't changed.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jun. 29, 2014 at 10:22 AM

Yes, I am afraid of what he'd do to me and my family.  

Quoting latsyrk: Are you concerned he may hurt you? I highly count he's changed, especially without intervention Doubt not count


ivy801
by Big Mama on Jun. 29, 2014 at 10:23 AM
If you tell her what he did, she might not even care and continue with her plans for a child. No one can know if he has change. It's a thibg that might be on your mind for years. Do you see these couple often?
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