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Should I let her visit her father?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 21 Replies

My daughter has just turned 16 and begs me to let her visit her father, who is in prison. He has been sentenced to 45 years for armed robbery, assault, weapons possession, and drug possession.

I live with my husband and our three kids who are 7, 9, and 13 years old. I can easily see why my daughter would want to be with her father since she sees her step-dad interact with the other kids every day. I am however concered that he would be a bad influence on her, and that it will be hard for her to have to deal with learning more about his crimes. I have had contact with the prison, who say that his behavior in prison is bad, and at times violent as well. We currently live in New Jeresy and he is in prison in Detroit so it would be a long trip too.

What would you do?

Posted by Anonymous on Jun. 29, 2014 at 11:58 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jun. 29, 2014 at 11:59 AM
she might need to see to move on
Ginger0104
by Ruby Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:00 PM
1 mom liked this

I would let her go see him.  Kill the curiosity. 

I'd be worried more about the lack of interaction with her stepfather than whatever possible influence someone she will see for an hour might have.

Danesmommy1
by Grammar Enthusiast on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:01 PM
I'd let her go, she's old enough IMO.
rockinmomto2
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:02 PM

I'd take her, but sit next to her the entire time. However, if his behavior is poor, they may not allow him to have visitors.

iamanon
by on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:03 PM
2 moms liked this

How exactly could he be any influence in her life? 
If you refuse to let her see him she will only grow up resenting you.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:04 PM
Let her see him, get the curoisty out of the way
MeAndTommyLee
by Angie on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:06 PM
1 mom liked this

At 16 it's her choice to visit her father and get to know him better.  He can't be a bad influence on her at this point in her life.  Perhaps she may be a good influence on him!  

cdjd23
by Gold Member on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:06 PM
2 moms liked this
Wait so step dad doesn't interact with your oldest dd?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:07 PM
Take her to see if. She will resent you if you Dont.
RitaTequila531
by *JuStRITa* on Jun. 29, 2014 at 12:07 PM

 

I agree, she's already 16 and should pretty much know right from wrong.

She should be allowed to go, especially since she'll get a visual on what happens when you choose to take the wrong path in life.

Quoting Danesmommy1: I'd let her go, she's old enough IMO.

 

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