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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I feel like a failure.

Posted by on Jul. 3, 2014 at 7:57 PM
  • 48 Replies

It has been 5 days of crying, meltdown after meltdown and freaking out.  I have been punched, scratched, shit on (not on purpose).  Literally every single thing I explain or tell to ds is completely ignored in favour of freaking the fuck out.  I am just at the end.  I am crying right now because I just can't handle this and am so in over my head.

For the first time in ds's 8 yrs I called a respite service.  

I have never ever felt the need to use this service, and I have alwys thought (just a little) that moms who do just don't know how to cope with autism well. 

But I am so at the end of my coping skills I just need to be able to breath.  They are sending someone tomorrow for an hour, just for me to get a break.  

I feel like such a failure needing a break from my own kid but there it is.  Bash away, I can't possibly feel any worse right now anyhow.

ETU

Thank you so much for the kind replies, I was in such a bad place this afternoon, and reading the replies brought me to tears. Thank you for the perspective, it was much needed.  

by on Jul. 3, 2014 at 7:57 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Pink_Sunshine_
by on Jul. 3, 2014 at 7:58 PM
1 mom liked this

hugs

catcameback
by on Jul. 3, 2014 at 7:59 PM

thanks

Quoting Pink_Sunshine_:

hugs


Jodee24
by Gold Member on Jul. 3, 2014 at 7:59 PM
💔. I completely understand and it sucks!! Hugs momma
GreenEyePixie
by Platinum Member on Jul. 3, 2014 at 8:00 PM
You are not a failure. Actually you are a great mom who realized she needs help and is seeking it. I hope you get the help you need and things get better quickly.


Just curious have you tried lavender to help calm him? It seems to help my oldest with his meltdowns.
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Pink_Sunshine_
by on Jul. 3, 2014 at 8:00 PM

I was so frustrated today so trust me, although it's not as extreme, I feel your pain.

OwlNuggets
by HAIL NUGGY! on Jul. 3, 2014 at 8:01 PM
3 moms liked this

Take that break!!!

We are NOT invincible and even the strongest of us crack at the edges when faced with extreme stress.

How can you be 100% for your kids if you're not 100% yourself? This is a NEEDED and REQUIRED break for YOUR sanity and to allow you to be the best mom you can be.

So recharge, refresh, and don't feel bad.

notjstanothrmom
by Ruby Member on Jul. 3, 2014 at 8:01 PM
2 moms liked this

YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE.

YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE.

corticosteroid
by Ruby Member on Jul. 3, 2014 at 8:02 PM
1 mom liked this

Caregiver stress is a real issue, don't waste a moment beating yourself up for needing a break.

SallieSusie
by Member on Jul. 3, 2014 at 8:02 PM
While I don't have the first idea of how it is to care for an autistic child, I commend you for getting the help you need. You WOULD be a failure if you knew how to get help and didn't, then did something in the midst of desperation that you cant take back. This is what good moms do.... whatever it takes.
catcameback
by on Jul. 3, 2014 at 8:03 PM

what do you do with it?

I haven't tried it, honestly this isn't normal for ds.  He's dealing with a health issue right now (extreme constipation) and it's setting him off.  Perhaps that's why I'm having such a hard time coping, it's not usually like this.

I am trying so hard to be patient but the crying and not listening to me when I tell him the solution is really getting to me.  It's wearing me down.

Quoting GreenEyePixie: You are not a failure. Actually you are a great mom who realized she needs help and is seeking it. I hope you get the help you need and things get better quickly. Just curious have you tried lavender to help calm him? It seems to help my oldest with his meltdowns.


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