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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

right of first refusal

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 38 Replies
My bf live together. His ex has full custody. We are looking to change that. She wants to add right of first refusal to the agreement. We want to use it against her. I don't work. While she works can day stay with me?
Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 5, 2014 at 7:04 PM
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Replies (1-10):
AngelSinger
by Platinum Member on Jul. 5, 2014 at 7:05 PM
Why would you want to use anything "against her"?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 5, 2014 at 7:07 PM
Wth does right of first refusal even mean? I hate to break it to you, but there aren't many attorneys on this site.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jul. 5, 2014 at 7:07 PM
6 moms liked this
You're just a live in gf so I doubt they'd give him custody based on your unemployment. Shes mom, hes dad, you're dads girlfriend, you don't get rights to their kid
BrutalTruth
by urbullyisshowing on Jul. 5, 2014 at 7:08 PM
2 moms liked this

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raegansmom
by Gold Member on Jul. 5, 2014 at 7:09 PM
I've inly heard of right of first refusal as a real estate term?!?
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
JoanahLee
by Gold Member on Jul. 5, 2014 at 7:10 PM
2 moms liked this

So heres what Right of First Refusal means, since most folks probably don't encounter this every day:

Right of first refusal is not something one would use against the other parent. It is designed so that if the parent with current physical custody is going to need someone else to watch the child, the other parent gets first dibs.  

If you plan to use this to screw each other (like saying yes then backing out at the last second so the ex can't go on her date or whatever) or use it to police and monitor your exs partners activities, then just leave it alone. 

Technically, if your using ROFR then your boufriend would need to be the one that was home while the two of you had his daughter.  Dads GF does not get a role in this. 

Also, ROFR does not trump school, preschool or even daycare in most situations.  This is for one-off child care needs. 

Defining right of first refusal

How to allocate parenting time in shared parenting situations is not always laid out in black-and-white, but the right of first refusal can help make this easier. Right of first refusal in custody situations commonly means that one parent must first offer the other parent the opportunity to look after their kids before contacting a babysitter or another family member to care for the children. 

Right of first refusal typically applies to both planned and last minute situations.  Therefore, if a parent makes plans for night out with friends two months, or even two days, prior to the actual event, they must offer the other parent the option to care for their children before making any other arrangements.  If the other parent decides not to take the kids during this time, then a third party caretaker such as a friend, babysitter or other family member may be asked to care for the children instead.   Right of first refusal may also apply to situations such as doctor’s appointments, vacations, after school daycare, and many other instances.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 5, 2014 at 7:10 PM

What if we got married?

Quoting Anonymous: You're just a live in gf so I doubt they'd give him custody based on your unemployment. Shes mom, hes dad, you're dads girlfriend, you don't get rights to their kid


Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Jul. 5, 2014 at 7:11 PM
You're just mooching girlfriend. You have zero rights to the child.
jamamama00
by Platinum Member on Jul. 5, 2014 at 7:13 PM
3 moms liked this
There is no way in hell some random bitch would be watching my child. Ever. Married or not.
AngelSinger
by Platinum Member on Jul. 5, 2014 at 7:15 PM
1 mom liked this
Still not your kid.

Quoting Anonymous:

What if we got married?

Quoting Anonymous: You're just a live in gf so I doubt they'd give him custody based on your unemployment. Shes mom, hes dad, you're dads girlfriend, you don't get rights to their kid

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