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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

50/50 custody

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 23 Replies

My son is almost 8 he has lived with me since he was born. His dad has been involved off and on. Him and his dad has never really had a  close relationship. His dad is more concerned with going out with his friends rather than seeing his son. He has maybe spent 3 nights overnight with his dad since he has been born.

His dad lives over and hour away from us. Out of no where his dad has asked me for 50/50 custody. I told  him no but told him he can have more time with our son if he would like. Unreasonable or not? 

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 9, 2014 at 9:20 AM
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Replies (1-10):
goldpandora
by Silver Member on Jul. 9, 2014 at 9:23 AM

If his father wants to go for 50/50 there is nothing you can do to stop him - all he has to do is file for it and it may or may not be awarded. See a lawyer ASAP if  you think that he might be serious about this.

bluebunnybabe
by Ruby Member on Jul. 9, 2014 at 9:24 AM
Reasonable but he could file anyway. It's good if you can just work with him on him having more time.
TiffanyRose06
by Queso<3 on Jul. 9, 2014 at 9:25 AM
No. Who's to say he won't pull the same shit? Do you have an order in place?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 9, 2014 at 9:25 AM
She doesn't have to agree to it.

Quoting goldpandora:

If his father wants to go for 50/50 there is nothing you can do to stop him - all he has to do is file for it and it may or may not be awarded. See a lawyer ASAP if  you think that he might be serious about this.

goldpandora
by Silver Member on Jul. 9, 2014 at 9:27 AM

Of course she doesn't. However, if he goes to court about this and there is a court order at the outcome stipulating that custody is 50/50 then she has to comply with it. That's why I think she might need to prepare herself.

Quoting Anonymous: She doesn't have to agree to it.
Quoting goldpandora:

If his father wants to go for 50/50 there is nothing you can do to stop him - all he has to do is file for it and it may or may not be awarded. See a lawyer ASAP if  you think that he might be serious about this.


Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 9, 2014 at 9:31 AM

He has already tried taking me to court for 50/50 and the judge denied his request. 

Quoting goldpandora:

Of course she doesn't. However, if he goes to court about this and there is a court order at the outcome stipulating that custody is 50/50 then she has to comply with it. That's why I think she might need to prepare herself.

Quoting Anonymous: She doesn't have to agree to it.
Quoting goldpandora:

If his father wants to go for 50/50 there is nothing you can do to stop him - all he has to do is file for it and it may or may not be awarded. See a lawyer ASAP if  you think that he might be serious about this.



chicagoliz
by Silver Member on Jul. 9, 2014 at 9:35 AM

Not unreasonable at all.  And I'm not surprised the judge denied his request -- you're not entitled to 50/50 just because you're genetically related.  50/50 is really for a divorce situation where the child has been living with both parents for his entire life.  

In fact, I would say it would be unreasonable if you HAD agreed to it.  

goldpandora
by Silver Member on Jul. 9, 2014 at 9:36 AM

I bet that was a relief!

I don't understand why he wants 50/50 if he lives so far away? It would be pretty hard to manage. Why is he going to this extreme rather than just trying to build up his time with his child?

Quoting Anonymous:

He has already tried taking me to court for 50/50 and the judge denied his request. 

Quoting goldpandora:

Of course she doesn't. However, if he goes to court about this and there is a court order at the outcome stipulating that custody is 50/50 then she has to comply with it. That's why I think she might need to prepare herself.

Quoting Anonymous: She doesn't have to agree to it.
Quoting goldpandora:

If his father wants to go for 50/50 there is nothing you can do to stop him - all he has to do is file for it and it may or may not be awarded. See a lawyer ASAP if  you think that he might be serious about this.




3sillykids
by Member on Jul. 9, 2014 at 9:38 AM
1 mom liked this

My kids sperm donor tried this as well. He never even bothered to get a court order for visitation and my twins are almost 8. The only reason he wanted to do 50/50 was because he assumed that if that was the case, then child support would stop. Mind you, this man NEVER see's the kids, has never been to any appt, ptc, extra curricular, etc.

He strictly wanted it on paper, because he was under the assumption that it would cancel child support.

Could the father in your situation think that as well?

Anonymous
by Anonymous - Original Poster on Jul. 9, 2014 at 9:40 AM

If his dad was an involved father and was a good dad, I would have agreed to 50/50. 

Quoting chicagoliz:

Not unreasonable at all.  And I'm not surprised the judge denied his request -- you're not entitled to 50/50 just because you're genetically related.  50/50 is really for a divorce situation where the child has been living with both parents for his entire life.  

In fact, I would say it would be unreasonable if you HAD agreed to it.  


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