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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

So was he just supposed to hand her a blank check?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 30 Replies

SS's BM is really starting to grate my nerves.  When DH picked up SS on Friday, BM was obviously hinting at the fact she doesn't know how she's going to buy school supplies and clothes.  BM's DH lost his job in February so they're struggling financially.  We were already planning on taking SS and my 2 kids school clothes shopping on Saturday (something we have done since they all started school) and we decided just to go get supplies too.  We got everything on everyone's list and new backpacks and lunch boxes.  So all 3 kids should be set.  So DH drops SS back off yesterday and, of course being 8, SS was excited to show BM what all he got.  Well BM just goes off on DH, saying he wasn't allowed to take him to get that stuff, it's her job.  She said she's taking it all back and she wanted the receipts.  What is she supposed to tell her other son when she can't get him all this new stuff.  DH asked her what she wanted then when she mentioned she didn't have the money.  She admitted she just wanted him to give her money so she could take him.  I just don't know what to do anymore.  We tried to help her out at ss's birthday in April and that backfired and now this.  We make decent money and DH is going to do whatever needs to be done to see that his kid's needs are met.  SS shouldn't do without when he has two separate families to take care of him.  

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 21, 2014 at 7:12 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 21, 2014 at 7:14 AM

BUMP!

JackAttacks
by Angel on Jul. 21, 2014 at 7:16 AM
1 mom liked this
What a mess.
Andrewsmom70
by Silver Member on Jul. 21, 2014 at 7:16 AM
Wow. Nothing like being unappreciative.

Anyway y'all can get SS full time so you don't have to deal with BM as much?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 21, 2014 at 7:18 AM
I can appreciate both sides. Your DH should take care of his son, but if I had two children living in the same house I would feel badly if one was getting treated differently from the other. She probably wants to spend half the money on each child, but that's not really fair to your DH. Hopefully I will never have this experience!
myperfect4inok
by Gold Member on Jul. 21, 2014 at 7:22 AM
2 moms liked this
I would not give her the receipts and tell her I'm sorry you are struggling. But it's not my job to take care of your other kids. Now you only have to worry about 2 not 3 and if you don't like it. You can take me to court.
myperfect4inok
by Gold Member on Jul. 21, 2014 at 7:24 AM
So turn it around Dad is struggling can't afford all new stuff for his kids living at home, should BM buy stuff for the two other kids living at dad's house?

Quoting Anonymous: I can appreciate both sides. Your DH should take care of his son, but if I had two children living in the same house I would feel badly if one was getting treated differently from the other. She probably wants to spend half the money on each child, but that's not really fair to your DH. Hopefully I will never have this experience!
chanizen
by Silver Member on Jul. 21, 2014 at 7:27 AM
Why would changing custody mean dealing with bm less?


Quoting Andrewsmom70: Wow. Nothing like being unappreciative.

Anyway y'all can get SS full time so you don't have to deal with BM as much?
my4kids274
by Platinum Member on Jul. 21, 2014 at 7:28 AM

While I would feel bad about the other children I would not hand over the reciepts to BM.  The other children are not your husbands responsiblity.  Plain and simple. 

hautemama83
by Emerald Member on Jul. 21, 2014 at 7:29 AM
I'd tell her to fuck off, and to get over herself. If she doesn't have to means to provide that's on her. Not your dh or ss. It's also not up to your dh to ensure her other child has the things they need.
chanizen
by Silver Member on Jul. 21, 2014 at 7:31 AM
If I were dh, I would smile and say "well, now you have extra I spend on the other one".

Or I suppose, if the other parent was truly distressed and we had a reasonable relationship, I would find some "extras" that I could give to them because there was a "two for one sale". Because it sucks to struggle financially and I wouldn't want a kid to feel that pain. Even when it isn't my kid.

But a couple hundred in school supplies wouldn't matter to me. If I could help, I would.
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