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Go ahead, call me a slut

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 16 Replies
I was with my ex boyfriend for a while then we found out I was pregnant. Well we found out that we lost the baby just as quick. Us almost being parents together made us realize that we really aren't compatible and we decided to part ways. Well apparently I think I'm invincible because about a week after we broke up, I slept with someone else and we didn't use protection. I started taking my birth control again after the miscarriage but we all know there's a grace period. He "pulled out" both times (it happened on a saturday then again that monday) and for some reason he thinks that means I couldn't have gotten pregnant by him. I'm almost 30 weeks pregnant. The first conception date I was given was 1/13 which was the monday and since then I have been given that and 1/11 which happens to be that saturday. Those are the only dates I've been given throughout the entire pregnancy and it's been by different doctors and ultrasound techs each time. I know that me being stupid and not thinking about consequences led me here but it's not my daughter's fault and she shouldn't have to grow up without a dad like I did because of my mistake. I wanna make him step up but I'm so afraid of it getting to the point of a DNA test and looking stupid because it turns out my ex is her father. I'm not looking for sympathy, just advice. It really sucks going through this alone. Could the conception date really be that off?
Also, the one I believe to be the father has showed an interest in me for most of the time, but very little for the baby. I don't want to be with him and therefore he is distancing himself from the baby. We've tried to work things out but there just isn't anything there.
Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:46 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Crashly
by Ashley on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:49 PM
Just get the DNA test. He isn't a bad person for thinking the baby might not be his.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:54 PM

so you are sure the 2nd guy is the father but you don't want to have to take a dna test and be proven wrong? Did you and your ex have sex before you broke up? Were you on bc then? And what is this grace period you talk about after a miscarriage???

km1970
by Platinum Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:54 PM

Get a dna test. As far as making someone step up and be a father, well that doesn't happen. Either they step up or they don't. Court orders for visitation and child support can be put into place, but that doesn't mean someone will become a parental figure. I hope for your daughter's sake, her father plays an active role in her life.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:57 PM
There is a grace period when getting back on birth control where you are not guaranteed to be protected. That is when I got pregnant because I stopped taking the birth control after I found out I was pregnant with the baby I lost. I am not against a DNA test I am just curious if my conception date could really be that off so I can prepare myself for whatever the results may be.

Quoting Anonymous:

so you are sure the 2nd guy is the father but you don't want to have to take a dna test and be proven wrong? Did you and your ex have sex before you broke up? Were you on bc then? And what is this grace period you talk about after a miscarriage???

Hanab818
by ThePonds on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:58 PM

Test both men. Hes not a bad person for thinking the baby might not be his. And yes it could be wrong.

ballerossandra
by Gold Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 2:59 PM
I stopped reading at " I slept with someone else "
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 23, 2014 at 3:00 PM
I misspoke. I am perfectly fine with getting a test because I believe that he would make an effort if it came back that he is the father. I guess I'm just nervous that my gut will be wrong and somehow she will not be his which would be terrible for her because there is no way my ex would be in her life.

Quoting km1970:

Get a dna test. As far as making someone step up and be a father, well that doesn't happen. Either they step up or they don't. Court orders for visitation and child support can be put into place, but that doesn't mean someone will become a parental figure. I hope for your daughter's sake, her father plays an active role in her life.

two4one
by Ruby Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 3:00 PM

Just get the DNA test. You were irresponsible, so I guess you will just have to deal with being uncomfortable. Hope the rest of your pregnancy is healthy and congrats on the baby.

couture-mommy
by 8.21.1831 on Jul. 23, 2014 at 3:01 PM
1 mom liked this
Slut.


Just following directions, I didn't read the OP
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 23, 2014 at 3:01 PM
1 mom liked this

I see. Sorry, I was a bit confused there. Yes, the date could be off. If the father steps up, great. If not, it is no ththe worst thing in the world to have happen to a child. Love your daughter the best you can, with or without him. And if I were the second guy, I would want a test, too. 

Quoting Anonymous: There is a grace period when getting back on birth control where you are not guaranteed to be protected. That is when I got pregnant because I stopped taking the birth control after I found out I was pregnant with the baby I lost. I am not against a DNA test I am just curious if my conception date could really be that off so I can prepare myself for whatever the results may be.
Quoting Anonymous:

so you are sure the 2nd guy is the father but you don't want to have to take a dna test and be proven wrong? Did you and your ex have sex before you broke up? Were you on bc then? And what is this grace period you talk about after a miscarriage???


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