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Thomas The Train Is A Dirty Commie

Posted by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 4:46 PM
  • 47 Replies
1 mom liked this

I've been telling my cousin this for a long time! Her son is OBSESSED with Thomas & Friends. One day I was watching him and was consequently subjected to about 4 hours of this show. I couldn't help but noticing all the crazy shit that was going down on the Isle Of Sodor! The main thing that bothered me (besides the race war between the diesel engines vs. steam engines) is that if sir Topham Hatt is not deeming them "very usefull engines" the poor engines are like beside themselves with shame and sadness! WTF kind of message is that?? If you don't do as The Man says, you're a worthless piece of crap? -That's what I heard!

Well, my cousin thinks I am crazy (and I am sure, a bunch of you will agree!) but I am not alone!! I was browsing Cracked.com today and came across this little nugget! 

After reading this, I googled something like "Thomas the train communism" and up popped about a bigillion more articles that agree with this theory. 

That being said, I'm not attacking anyone who lets their kids watch this show. It's not the end of the world and I'm not saying anyone is a bad parent or anything like that. This show just creeps me out and I'm glad to see I am not the only one who sense's it.

#17. Thomas the Tank Engine Lives in a Totalitarian Dystopia

Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends, a story about sentient trains learning about responsibility, friendship and all that noise, might possibly be the most sickeningly wholesome children's show in existence. With that in mind, it'd take some pretty massive balls to accuse said show of, say, promoting totalitarianism, fascism and racism.

Shauna Wilton, a professor of political sciences at the University of Alberta, has just such balls. She argues that the world of Thomas the Tank Engine is in reality a fascist, racist hellhole where dreams go to die and where only "useful" elements are allowed to continue to toil away in pointless misery.


Oh yeah. Stick more proles in the carriage and it would totally be 1984.

Or maybe ... maybe someone switched Wilton's Thomas DVDs with Schindler's List.

Why It's Not That Crazy:

Here's a totally hypothetical question: What if one of the trains on the show decided that he wanted to do something else with his life, like travel or star on Snakes on a Train 2: Snake Harder? He'd probably get yelled at and told to get back to work.


Trains can never really follow their own path. It's like a metaphor or something.

You see, on the island of Sodor where the show takes place, there is only room for really useful engines. That's not only the show's catch phrase, but also the basic summary of every episode in the series. That is, the engines are either trying to prove themselves or worrying that they aren't working hard enough (see "James and the Coaches," "Thomas, Percy and the Post Train," "Tender Engines" and many more).

This totalitarian obsession with usefulness is instilled in the engines by the iron fist of Sir Topham Hatt, aka the Fat Controller, who swiftly punishes all those deemed as "useless."


Look at his hands. There's no way this guy has ever contributed anything to society.

In the episode "Break Van," Hatt has two twin engines, Donald and Douglas, compete against each other to determine which one he will send back to Scotland to be destroyed. In "The Sad Story of Henry," when an engine refuses to go out of the tunnel because of the rain, Hatt actually gives orders to brick him alive in the tunnel.


"Oh man, what the fuck ...?"

You can't really defend any of this by saying that the trains are Hatt's property. They are obviously sentient beings capable of emotions ... one of which unfortunately happens to be racism. In the show, there is a clear feud going on between the steam engines like Thomas and Percy and the diesel engines, who are depicted as stubborn, lazy and shifty.

In the episode "Daisy," a diesel named Daisy arrives on Sodor and flat out refuses to do chores. In "The Diseasel," a diesel called BoCo is accused of stealing trucks. In "Thomas's Day Off," a new, lazy diesel, Dennis, tricks Thomas into doing his work. Even the closest thing the show has to a villain is a diesel fucking named DIESEL.


"BRING ME MORE VICTIMS!"

But maybe there is some perfectly reasonable, nonracist explanation for why the trains that run on clean white steam dislike the trains powered by dirty, black diesel oil. So, if you can think of one, please tell us, because we're just dying to hear it.



Read more: http://www.cracked.com/article_21213_the-42-most-insane-but-convincing-fan-theories-ever-found_p7.html#ixzz38KEip1nG

by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 4:46 PM
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Replies (1-10):
SouthTxPrincess
by Silver Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 4:51 PM
Ive never really watched it, ive always found it incredibly boring and my kids dont like it either. So im no help.
Elaflynts
by Silver Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 5:02 PM

Thankfully my son hates it too

Quoting SouthTxPrincess: Ive never really watched it, ive always found it incredibly boring and my kids dont like it either. So im no help.


mrsrodgers0703
by Emerald Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 5:07 PM
2 moms liked this
My Ds likes Thomas. I think Thomas can be a lil mouthy, but I don't mind the show. I think you're reading way too much into it. I hate Daniel Tiger and Caillou because they're whiney lil jerks.
katemckenzie
by Kate on Jul. 23, 2014 at 5:09 PM
2 moms liked this
OMFG thank you! I've been telling DF this for years, and he just says I'm reading too much into it lol
Elaflynts
by Silver Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 5:24 PM
1 mom liked this

That's what everyone keeps saying to me! 

I think we're on to something

lol

Quoting katemckenzie: OMFG thank you! I've been telling DF this for years, and he just says I'm reading too much into it lol


oryxx31
by Captain Cook on Jul. 23, 2014 at 5:28 PM
I think this is reading a bit much into it. Talking trains as Marxist allegory just seems a stretch.
He is super boring though. My brother was crazy into it as a little kid. The teacher called a conference cause he was "naming his numbers." He was just telling her about the stupid trains, but she thought he was like, disturbed. I couldn't believe a preschool teacher wasn't aware of Thomas.
Elaflynts
by Silver Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 8:04 PM

"She thought he was like, disturbed"

lololol 

:)

Quoting oryxx31: I think this is reading a bit much into it. Talking trains as Marxist allegory just seems a stretch. He is super boring though. My brother was crazy into it as a little kid. The teacher called a conference cause he was "naming his numbers." He was just telling her about the stupid trains, but she thought he was like, disturbed. I couldn't believe a preschool teacher wasn't aware of Thomas.


KristaP13
by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 8:05 PM
1 mom liked this

Your title is gold. 

I'm laughing my ass off. 

Good points too. 

TwoPennies
by Silver Member on Jul. 23, 2014 at 8:07 PM
3 moms liked this
Thomas is also a cheeky little shit who creates problems everywhere he goes. And it's not like he even owns up to his bullshit. Nope. He blames everyone else. Usually Gordon or James or those "Troublesome Trucks"
sugieboogieboo
by on Jul. 23, 2014 at 8:07 PM
1 mom liked this
There's also blatant racism. The boys love it, so we watch it, but it's horrible.
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