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It's my fault he's delayed.

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 56 Replies

At least that is what I constantly keep thinking, I try to shake it, but I can't. 

My son is 24 months, he is non verbal, I have had my concerns for the last 13 months, & here we are at his 2nd birthday, & he doesn't talk. 

I can't help but think I'm to blame in some way, shape, or form. I'm constantly fighting back tears. He finally saw a speech pathologist, her concern just made it a lot more "real". Ever since that appointment, I'm loosing sleep, can't help but feel bad for him, I just wish he could or would talk, I just so badly want to hear his voice, just stopping & realizing that no, I can't talk to him, he doesn't share things with me, & I don't hear I love you, is probably one of the saddest feelings I have ever felt in my entire life. 

Never did I think I would be in this situation, never did I think my son would have a disability/delay/disorder. 

My older son (6) is the polar opposite, he is quite advanced as well, he academically surpasses his age range (already reads at a grade 3 to 4 level, & learning more complex math). 

With my first, I smoked cigarettes, marijuana, & drank. I quit the day I found out at about roughly 7 weeks, but still, my pre-health was clearly less than optimal. He wasn't planned, but once I got the positive, I changed my eating habits, quit all of the above that same day, started taking Materna the following, & had a great pregnancy despite not anticipating it. 

With my 2 year old, he was planned, right down to the month I wanted him born in. I changed my eating habits months before TTC, started my prenatals 2 months before TTC, didn't smoke (either), & my drinks were a glass of wine during a family get together. My pregnancy did have some bumps in the road. 

I sit & I just think how badly I tried to do it right for my son, & I feel like somehow I let him down. I try my best, I"m looking for resources, but at the end of the day literally, the eyes swell once everyone goes to bed, & I just so desperately wish when I wake up he will call me mommy, he will just start talking & things will feel "normal" like they did 14 months ago. 

I guess I just needed an outlet, I'm a bit ashamed to vent to family or friends, they just tell me how bright he is despite being non verbal (he really is, I'm blessed to have both my children), others say they will pray for me, of course, others tell me Einstein didn't talk until 3 or was it 4. Either way, I needed a place to pour a bit of my heart out, thank goodness for anonymous options!

If you read this all, thank you. 

Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 25, 2014 at 12:06 AM
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Replies (1-10):
KristenFowles
by Ruby Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 12:07 AM

 Wait..

Didn't I just respond to this post?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 25, 2014 at 12:08 AM

You did, I'm not sure what happened but my post was gone, so I reposted, I didn't get a chance to read what you wrote, just see your notification. Sorry about that. 

Quoting KristenFowles:

 Wait..

Didn't I just respond to this post?


thefiregoddess
by MotherDucker on Jul. 25, 2014 at 12:10 AM
1 mom liked this
My child didn't talk until three. Completely normal eight year old
ba13ygrl1987
by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 12:10 AM
1 mom liked this
There are so many worse things that could be wrong then just not talking. The speech therapist will work with him and my guess is he will male leaps and bounds in progress. No real reason to beat yourself up
KristenFowles
by Ruby Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 12:10 AM

 I just said that it isn't your fault.

And he's only 2.. by no means does that mean he is truly non verbal.  My son didn't start really talking until after 2.   And he's perfect. 

And worse case scenerio, if he does turn out to be non verbal.. Like you said, it certainly doesn't mean that he isn't bright. 

 

Quoting Anonymous:

You did, I'm not sure what happened but my post was gone, so I reposted, I didn't get a chance to read what you wrote, just see your notification. Sorry about that. 

Quoting KristenFowles:

 Wait..

Didn't I just respond to this post?

 

 

ApacheRose72
by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 12:11 AM
1 mom liked this
I used sign language. Like literally signed milk every time my child drank, etc. and she was able to communicate with us before she could speak. And I get how you feel. It's normal but it's not your fault. We do he best we can!
deboramomof2
by đź’‹sweetcandyđź’‹ on Jul. 25, 2014 at 12:14 AM
My son is 3 with a speech delay ...

he did nothing but baby talk when he was 2 ...and he saying a lot more words now but not full sentences

he talks to me like he telling me something and at times I don't understand and I feel so bad :( ...
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 25, 2014 at 12:14 AM
Einstein didn't talk until he was 4. Other than speech does he seem delayed with other milestones?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jul. 25, 2014 at 12:15 AM
Ds is three and a half, and only recently started talking. He has autism, and it took me months to come to terms with it. Therapy and school have helped him immensely. Please don't blame yourself. You're being proactive and that's amazing.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 25, 2014 at 12:16 AM

Thank you

Quoting KristenFowles:

 I just said that it isn't your fault.

And he's only 2.. by no means does that mean he is truly non verbal.  My son didn't start really talking until after 2.   And he's perfect. 

And worse case scenerio, if he does turn out to be non verbal.. Like you said, it certainly doesn't mean that he isn't bright. 

 

Quoting Anonymous:

You did, I'm not sure what happened but my post was gone, so I reposted, I didn't get a chance to read what you wrote, just see your notification. Sorry about that. 

Quoting KristenFowles:

 Wait..

Didn't I just respond to this post?


 


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