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Those of you who hope your girls grow up to be modest dressers...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 25 Replies
Can you post some examples of fashionable modest outfits?

Do you think a tank top can be modest? Shorts? A dress that hits mid-thigh?

My husband and I are LDS and even though I thought I modelled a good example of nice, modest outfits growing up, my daughter has left the church and is dressing in a way that I guess is less immodest than many of her peers, but not modest in my view. So, id like to see if I'm off base in my thinking.
Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 25, 2014 at 10:44 AM
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virgoj3
by on Jul. 25, 2014 at 10:48 AM
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Do not confuse your daughter's choice to explore her own ideals with not setting a good example.  You DID - that is apparent in the fact that while she may dress immodestly in your opinion, she is dressing more modestly than her peers.  You obviously parented well if she;s exploring her own identity - give her the space she needs to explore her faith.  Be there, listen, love her and make sure she knows that you love the woman she has become.  Realize that she has to navigate through her own life and she will make mistakes.  And that is OK :)

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 25, 2014 at 10:48 AM

What is she wearing?  Do you have any examples?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jul. 25, 2014 at 10:49 AM
I am LDS as well. IMO, if whatever is being worn would not cover garments, then its not modest. My DD is 6. I let her was tank tops with a button up shirt over it. She also wears a one-piece swimsuit. She wears skirts with leggings and longer shorts that come down to a few inches above her knee. No short shorts. I'm so sorry your DD has chosen to leave the Church. How old is she?
SweetPea2004
by Ruby Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 10:49 AM

My daughter is almost ten (this picture was almost a year ago). This is what I consider modest, the neckline is a little low but we fixed it since. 

faire_jour
by Ruby Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 10:54 AM

Well, I'm LDS too, so we have the same standards for modesty. We only go three fingers above the knee, everything must have sleeves and no belly showing. 

caito
by Ruby Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 10:56 AM
1 mom liked this

I feel as long as the buttcheeks and boobs aren't hanging out, and you can't see a midriff, it's fine. I'm sure my idea of modest wildly varies from what the average LDS would consider modest. But I think my idea of modest is a bit different than what some other people consider modest. Like I don't want my daughter wearing a bikini, but a lot of people are okay with that.

edit: Here's what my daughter wore to a wedding last month.

And here's what she wore last week when we went grocery shopping. Sometimes I put a white t-shirt under the dress.


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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 25, 2014 at 11:28 AM
Dresses and shorts and skirts that are about where her fingertips are which is short in my eyes but nothing is hanging out, tank tops that are tight, shirts that are looser but lower cut.

Quoting Anonymous:

What is she wearing?  Do you have any examples?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 25, 2014 at 11:31 AM
Thank you. It's been very hard for us. She's 24 and her faith was always a struggle for her, but she's recently seemed much more anti-faith than ever which has been hard for us. She drinks, dresses differently and lives with her boyfriend so it was a lot to get used to.

She wears a bikini (which I thought was gonna give my DH a heart attack when he saw a pic of it) but other than that she wears non garment covering clothing that isn't particularly showy or revealing, but it's much different than what id call modest. It makes it hard for me to see the line.

Quoting Anonymous: I am LDS as well. IMO, if whatever is being worn would not cover garments, then its not modest. My DD is 6. I let her was tank tops with a button up shirt over it. She also wears a one-piece swimsuit. She wears skirts with leggings and longer shorts that come down to a few inches above her knee. No short shorts. I'm so sorry your DD has chosen to leave the Church. How old is she?
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jul. 25, 2014 at 11:48 AM
Oh my! I know someone whose similar to your dd. She was born and raised in the church. She's been inactive for years. Had a baby out of wedlock with a married man. Put the baby up for adoption. Lived with her now ex husband for like 8 years before getting married to him. Had a daughter with him. Started cheating on him. Told him she wanted an open relationship. He said no they got divorced. She is a heavy drinker, smokes cigarettes, has tats including one of the inverted pentogram with a rams head the sign of the devil. She sleeps with men after only knowing them less than 2 hours. She dresses very inappropriately. I am not saying your dd does all of this. I'm just sharing that I know a bit of what you are dealing with. Her parents had 5 kids. Only one of the five is active in church. The rest drink, cheat on spouses, etc. Its really sad IMO.

Quoting Anonymous: Thank you. It's been very hard for us. She's 24 and her faith was always a struggle for her, but she's recently seemed much more anti-faith than ever which has been hard for us. She drinks, dresses differently and lives with her boyfriend so it was a lot to get used to.

She wears a bikini (which I thought was gonna give my DH a heart attack when he saw a pic of it) but other than that she wears non garment covering clothing that isn't particularly showy or revealing, but it's much different than what id call modest. It makes it hard for me to see the line.

Quoting Anonymous: I am LDS as well. IMO, if whatever is being worn would not cover garments, then its not modest. My DD is 6. I let her was tank tops with a button up shirt over it. She also wears a one-piece swimsuit. She wears skirts with leggings and longer shorts that come down to a few inches above her knee. No short shorts. I'm so sorry your DD has chosen to leave the Church. How old is she?
MIA0223
by Emerald Member on Jul. 25, 2014 at 11:52 AM

We are Muslim and I dress very modest. Hands and face show and that's it.
My DD is only 6, and we have rules for modest dressing for her, but much more lax than what I wear and hope she grows to wear.
When we go out legs must be covered, no spaghetti straps, but tanks like this are ok. Shorts must cover past her bottom.
She will decide when she is older how modest she wants to dress.
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