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16 & expecting a baby; how to tell Mom?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 26 Replies

 

Poll

Question: Telling my mom, would you?

Options:

announce w/ cutesy photo

just tell her matter-of-factly

don't tell her until the baby's here


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 55

View Results

Actually I'm 27, married, and mom of 1 already. But we're adopting. And my mom is going to freak out. (She's not pro-adoption tho I'm sure she'll love the baby eventually.) So . .  would you go with a more dramatic, cutesy announcement even tho u know the reaction will be negative? Or would you try to do something low key b/c the reaction will be negative? I wanted to make a card w/ one of those cute photo shoots "we are expecting, just not sure when." But wonder if doing something cutesy will make the negative reaction hurt even worse?

Since she loves kids, just not the idea of adoption, I've also considered not telling her until the baby arrives. That way she can just fall in love with the baby. Thoughts?


Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 27, 2014 at 5:49 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Chris030406
by anonsneednotreply on Jul. 27, 2014 at 5:51 PM
1 mom liked this
What are her reasons for not supporting adoption? Such an odd thing to dislike!
Lilith23
by Platinum Member on Jul. 27, 2014 at 5:53 PM
4 moms liked this
Don't tell her, invite her over when the baby is there, make your husband wrap her in a blanket and in a box, ring, run and tell your mother to open the door.....do it, oh! Leave a note " Spencer he's yours" she'll be more upset about why a random baby has a note with your husband's name then the actually adoption and.... Just make it a complete fuckery.



oooooooor! You can just be like " mom we're adopting, it's our choice." the end.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 27, 2014 at 5:53 PM

she's a worrier and afraid it will end up horribly.

Quoting Chris030406: What are her reasons for not supporting adoption? Such an odd thing to dislike!


lucky2Beeme
by Ruby Member on Jul. 27, 2014 at 5:54 PM

I would wait because I would not want to hear her negative words. She will turn a lovely exciting time into a hurtful mess. I would not give her that opportunity.  What you are doing is wonderful . Its something you decided to do . She either should support your decision or keep quite. Its her job as your mom to support you. Well at least that's my role to my kids.

2ninos4me
by Mrs.Erika2 on Jul. 27, 2014 at 5:56 PM
Youre a grown woman and if your mom doesn't agree with you adopting then is HER loss not yours .

And if she isn't pro adoption. The announcing part won't change her mind but your new baby's presence will eventually give her a change of heart :)
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Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 27, 2014 at 5:58 PM

BUMP!

Chris030406
by anonsneednotreply on Jul. 27, 2014 at 5:58 PM
My middle is adopted. But it wasn't something we actively sought out, kwim? His parents died. He was in foster. We decided to adopt him. It definitely hasn't been easy. Even though he came to is as an infant, he had suffered such trauma that, according to the therapists, it'll never fully leave him.

Make sure the birth mother is taking care of herself. Learn as much as you can about the medical history. Try to adopt as soon as possible (age wise).

Quoting Anonymous:

she's a worrier and afraid it will end up horribly.

Quoting Chris030406: What are her reasons for not supporting adoption? Such an odd thing to dislike!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 27, 2014 at 6:15 PM

BUMP!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 27, 2014 at 6:31 PM

BUMP!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 27, 2014 at 6:38 PM

It sounds like you want to do the cutsey photo for YOU so I think you should do it.  Do it for your family and future kiddo.  He/she will appreciate it.   Share it with your mom and tell her that you know she worries that everything won't work out, but you feel it's worth the risk and excited about the possibility of adding a new little one to your family.  Best wishes.

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