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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

I just witness something so awful its shocking. What should I do?

Posted by on Jul. 28, 2014 at 9:13 PM
  • 586 Replies
1 mom liked this
A pregnant mommy at my office is having a baby girl in a few months. The whole office knows this baby girls has anaspefily (sorry I know it's not spelled right) and will either be delivered still born or live for only minutes after birth. Well a few co workers and I decided to throw her a baby shower, she gave us the baby registery to receipt thing to put in the invites. I passed them out and a few women asked why she would need baby things and said they were just going to get her a card.
I'm HORRIFIED! Should I say something to these ladies? I will buy $300 worth of baby gifts of it means she gets the baby shower she deserves!
What would you do?


EDIT: She wants the baby shower, she made the registry before anyone mentioned it to her. She's excited for it . If it's something she really really wants I don't see how it's cruel.

EDIT 2: So I should basically tell her "Sorry I can't throw the shower you wanted so badly because your soon to be dead daughter don't need it!"?
by on Jul. 28, 2014 at 9:13 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 on Jul. 28, 2014 at 9:15 PM
44 moms liked this
I.don't understand why you would pretend the baby will survive long enough to leave the hospital and use the items. Not being cruel, I just don't understand.
Bluescorpia
by Shanoon on Jul. 28, 2014 at 9:15 PM
1 mom liked this
Does she know she is having a baby shower?
SitaStJames
by *Sita* on Jul. 28, 2014 at 9:16 PM
25 moms liked this

not to sound heartless but why does she need baby things if the baby isn't expected to survive? I'm not even sure a baby shower is even appropiate in this type of situation...

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 28, 2014 at 9:16 PM
3 moms liked this
I would tell them not to come. Gifts are not required at baby shower but just for their rude insensitive behavior , I would tell them to stay home.
phoebe81
by Silver Member on Jul. 28, 2014 at 9:17 PM
133 moms liked this

Wouldn't it better to gift the mother with things for herself to help her in her time of grief? Like, pampering type stuff. Otherwise she's going to end up with a ton of baby stuff that she can't use and that she will just have to figure out what to do with. A woman shouldn't have to worry about how to get rid of baby stuff when she's grieving the loss of her child. I personally find it insensitive to dump a bunch of un-needed baby stuff on the mother.

I do agree and commend you for wanting to throw the mother a baby shower and acknowledge her child, even despite the tragic circumstances. I just wonder if baby stuff is the right way to go here...

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Jul. 28, 2014 at 9:17 PM
22 moms liked this
If i knew my baby wasn't going to live i wouldn't want a baby shower. What is she going to do with all that stuff. It would be a terrible painful reminder
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 28, 2014 at 9:17 PM
11 moms liked this
Every baby should be celebrated though, don't you agree? No matter how they we get to be with them, all are special :)

Quoting SitaStJames:

not to sound heartless but why does she need baby things if the baby isn't expected to survive? I'm not even sure a baby shower is even appropiate in this type of situation...

Famousglm714
by Gina on Jul. 28, 2014 at 9:18 PM


Quoting SitaStJames:

not to sound heartless but why does she need baby things if the baby isn't expected to survive? I'm not even sure a baby shower is even appropiate in this type of situation...

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 28, 2014 at 9:19 PM
7 moms liked this
Some people have hope until the very end :(

Quoting Anonymous: I.don't understand why you would pretend the baby will survive long enough to leave the hospital and use the items. Not being cruel, I just don't understand.
NSA.
by on Jul. 28, 2014 at 9:19 PM
11 moms liked this
Because she wants to celebrate the birth of her daughter. She wants what every other pregnant mother wants. Wouldn't you? They can't say for sure the severity of the defect so she may survive. She should get gifts so she can Charish her daughter things if she passes.
If I had a sick baby the last thing I would want is to be treated differently. She has told me that as well.

Quoting SitaStJames:

not to sound heartless but why does she need baby things if the baby isn't expected to survive? I'm not even sure a baby shower is even appropiate in this type of situation...

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