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I'm getting judged so hard

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 17 Replies
My 16 yr old stepson is here. He is a smoker. He has been a smoker for a couple of years now. His mother lets him smoke, his father lets him smoke, I cringe every time I see him smoking. I was outside on the patio with him and DH as he smoked, and our neighbors gave us all these nasty looks. Which, whatever, honestly I would judge us too. But now they've stopped talking to me entirely and are still talking to DH. Wtf is that about? Lol that irks me a little bit, man, like this isn't my bag! Damn...

Stepmothers never win haha
Posted by Anonymous on Jul. 30, 2014 at 2:45 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Larae1990
by on Jul. 30, 2014 at 2:48 PM
Tell him he's not allowed to smoke at your house
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 30, 2014 at 2:51 PM
I tried that two years ago. DH overrode that decision recently. It doesn't really matter, because when I told him not to smoke in the house he just hid in the bathroom & his room smoking anyways. At least now he is outside and I don't have to be enraged over him smelling up my house anymore.

Quoting Larae1990: Tell him he's not allowed to smoke at your house
Larae1990
by on Jul. 30, 2014 at 2:57 PM
Damn that's hard, but ur right at least it's not inside

Quoting Anonymous: I tried that two years ago. DH overrode that decision recently. It doesn't really matter, because when I told him not to smoke in the house he just hid in the bathroom & his room smoking anyways. At least now he is outside and I don't have to be enraged over him smelling up my house anymore.

Quoting Larae1990: Tell him he's not allowed to smoke at your house
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 30, 2014 at 3:02 PM

Buy him an e-cig as a compromise.

True story, I like them better than the real thing. Plus, he's 16, so I would never ever want someone under 18 smoking on my property. (even though I realize you are battling against DH on that one)

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Jul. 30, 2014 at 3:17 PM
Those things are expensive for me to buy for someone I don't think should be smoking in the first place. But maybe you're right, maybe that is my only alternative. I'm filled with disgust most of the time over DH's and BM's parenting decisions when it comes to SS. Seriously, they both suck. I don't know why DH in particular does these things. It just irks me that the neighbors looked at me and acted like it was my decision and still treat DH with respect like he had nothing to do with it. At least blame us both, I would think that was more fair, at least, since they can't possibly know the truth.

Quoting Anonymous:

Buy him an e-cig as a compromise.

True story, I like them better than the real thing. Plus, he's 16, so I would never ever want someone under 18 smoking on my property. (even though I realize you are battling against DH on that one)

mrspeterrabbit
by Platinum Member on Jul. 30, 2014 at 3:21 PM
Make him go out back.
ausomezombie2.0
by Silver Member on Jul. 30, 2014 at 3:22 PM
:( I'd ask him not to do it around me
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Jul. 30, 2014 at 3:25 PM

Actually they are REALLY inexpensive at a vape shop (not the gas station ones or the ones at a kiosk in the mall!) My setup cost $30. Way cheaper than the cigs that I'm sure he isn't buying himself(not to imply you are, but someone clearly is), and actually, a LOT better for you (despite the FDA trying to deem them unsafe just so they can tax the crap out of them)

As far as your neighbors, who gives a crap what they think. They aren't inside the situation to understand the position you're in. There's only so much fight you can put up. Honestly, it's his son, and the attitude that you as his wife should have some sort of control over him is BS.  Gotta have harmony in the marriage too. That's why I suggested a compromise :) Could work!

Quoting Anonymous: Those things are expensive for me to buy for someone I don't think should be smoking in the first place. But maybe you're right, maybe that is my only alternative. I'm filled with disgust most of the time over DH's and BM's parenting decisions when it comes to SS. Seriously, they both suck. I don't know why DH in particular does these things. It just irks me that the neighbors looked at me and acted like it was my decision and still treat DH with respect like he had nothing to do with it. At least blame us both, I would think that was more fair, at least, since they can't possibly know the truth.
Quoting Anonymous:

Buy him an e-cig as a compromise.

True story, I like them better than the real thing. Plus, he's 16, so I would never ever want someone under 18 smoking on my property. (even though I realize you are battling against DH on that one)


CadesMum
by Gold Member on Jul. 30, 2014 at 3:26 PM

So what disciplinary action is taking place?

momto3B
by on Jul. 30, 2014 at 3:27 PM

Why does your DH think his son smoking is okay?? 

Quoting Anonymous: I tried that two years ago. DH overrode that decision recently. It doesn't really matter, because when I told him not to smoke in the house he just hid in the bathroom & his room smoking anyways. At least now he is outside and I don't have to be enraged over him smelling up my house anymore.
Quoting Larae1990: Tell him he's not allowed to smoke at your house


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