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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

do I lack parenting strategies or are most 3 y olds like this?

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

I can't do ANYTHING while my son is awake.NOTHING.I am almost not even able to go to the bathroom , cook or even make a phone call. By the time he is alseep, I am exhausted and cleaning, ironing,etc rarely get done.

He has been sick for 2 days and therefore, I allowed him to use the ipad.He knows we ONLY use it when we have to wait a long time at the dr or when he has a fever.Well yesterday he was down and he was on the couch next to me with a few apps on my ipad. I set the timer and I told him that when those 15 minutes ended, we were going to do arts and crafts. I wanted to finish a movie i had started watching 3 nights before so I turned the tv on. he threw a tantrum as he wanted the TV.yes, not just the ipad but also the tv. this is just an example of what he does all the time. When i take 15 minutes for him to play with something so that I can cook, make a phone or just have 15 m for me, he wants to do what I am doing. Lately I can't even shower as he wants a shower with mommy. The terrible twos were NOTHING. he turned 3 two weeks ao and he is moe demanding than ever...

I let him help in the kitchen, vaccuum, help with dishes and laundry....but he ends up making more mess than what I woud do withiut his help.

i am exhausted

do I really lack strategies or are some 3 y olds like that?

some of the moms in our playgroup told me their kids are pretty much the same and at 6 pm when hubby comes, they get all done and give the kid to daddy but I can't do that.it is just me

helpppppppppppppppppppppppp

Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 2, 2014 at 4:07 PM
Replies (91-98):
GhettoKoolAide
by Lighthouse Blues on Aug. 2, 2014 at 9:04 PM
You're an idiot.

That is all.

Quoting Anonymous: It's not "baby wearing" at three years old. It's "I don't know how to parent my child and teach him/her independence".

Quoting GhettoKoolAide: Sounds normal.

I baby wear for the reason.

My son is 2.5 and loves his toddler Tula which is designed for front or back carries.

A lot of times children don't hear because they're overwhelmed with the emotions/feelings they are having in that moment.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 15 on Aug. 2, 2014 at 9:05 PM
My first son was the easiest baby and toddler until the day he turned 3 he turned into a total nightmare and still is at 6. My youngest has been the most difficult baby ever, and a complete pain but at almost 2 he has turned around and his behavior is getting better by the day now. Lol My two are polar opposites in everything so I'm hoping that by 3 he's a perfect angel like my older son was.

Quoting Anonymous:

my therapist said the same. She said that the terrible twos are really nothing and according to her the terrible twos are the threes

Quoting Tay06: My son is three and I have had more trouble with him now than I did when he was two. He was a sweet two year old, but the past year hrle throws tantrums for no reason, starts crying for no reason, becomes violent, and doesn't like to share. His dr. Believes it is a stage and he's normal but idk if I agree. I know every kid is different but he's a lot of work

Mrs.AmandaD.
by Bronze Member on Aug. 2, 2014 at 9:09 PM
It is a tough age. Be consistent and follow through. I'm sure that's what you keep hearing. My three year old is almost four and still has tantrums but he knows the drill now and he has consequences if he doesn't listen.
katemckenzie
by Kate on Aug. 2, 2014 at 9:28 PM
He's 31 lbs, but if i tried to wear him, he'd probably try to strangle me from being so pissed off. He's been boycotting strollers for almost 2 years, I can't imagine what he'd do with that.

Quoting GhettoKoolAide: My son is 3ft and 31lbs.

I also tandem wear a set of my twins at my job.

That's 20 on the front and 23 on the back.

IF you have the carrier if really isn't bad.

I'm really too heavy so having weight on my back helps straighten me up.

Quoting katemckenzie: I can't even imagine wearing my son. He's just a short teenager...

Quoting GhettoKoolAide: Sounds normal.

I baby wear for the reason.

My son is 2.5 and loves his toddler Tula which is designed for front or back carries.

A lot of times children don't hear because they're overwhelmed with the emotions/feelings they are having in that moment.
GhettoKoolAide
by Lighthouse Blues on Aug. 2, 2014 at 10:24 PM
That's why I wear my son.

He is 2.5 and has hated the stroller since 18 months.

A good carrier seats a child with their legs in the proper 'M' position so its like sitting in a chair.

We use ours at home when he wants to be a stage 9 clinger and when we're out and he gets tired and/or over stimulated.

Quoting katemckenzie: He's 31 lbs, but if i tried to wear him, he'd probably try to strangle me from being so pissed off. He's been boycotting strollers for almost 2 years, I can't imagine what he'd do with that.

Quoting GhettoKoolAide: My son is 3ft and 31lbs.

I also tandem wear a set of my twins at my job.

That's 20 on the front and 23 on the back.

IF you have the carrier if really isn't bad.

I'm really too heavy so having weight on my back helps straighten me up.

Quoting katemckenzie: I can't even imagine wearing my son. He's just a short teenager...

Quoting GhettoKoolAide: Sounds normal.

I baby wear for the reason.

My son is 2.5 and loves his toddler Tula which is designed for front or back carries.

A lot of times children don't hear because they're overwhelmed with the emotions/feelings they are having in that moment.
Ray-of-Beezy
by Silver Member on Aug. 2, 2014 at 10:53 PM
Well I wasn't trying to imply that you are slave driving your toddler. I'm just simply saying if you're trying to lessen your load while cleaning, while still allowing him to help then you need to keep things simple and not expect to get things done in a timely manner. Running the vacuum after you've vacuumed is a perfect example. If he isn't entertained with that then you can either find a way to have him help you with your next task or enforce quiet time which can be drawing or reading, or building blocks. If he still insists on following you around, you just need to be consistent with quiet time. I don't have a lot of issues with my son now, but if he does happen to interrupt me while I'm busy (cleaning, paying bills, etc) I will stop what I'm doing to acknowledge what he wants (typically to show me what he's built with Legos or have drawn), and I send him back, after praising his creation and hard work, to build me or draw me something else. You just need to get your son comfortable with doing things on his own, and that's achieved over time. Since you're single (don't know if you're a SAHM, WAHM, or work outside if the home), hire a sitter or see if one of the mothers in your play group are willing to take your son on for a few hours and y'all can do trade offs. Or if you could just hire someone to clean your home a few days a week, provided you have the finances to cover that. However I feel the biggest issue isn't the house, it's teaching your toddler that indepence and time to himself is a good thing.

Quoting Anonymous:

I didn't mean in in w way that meant that I wanted him to clean. I basically keep him engaged so that i can do something as well. For instance, first i vaccuum and then I let him do it.We sort out laundry, he organized his books, he "dusts" furniture and "makes his bed...

Quoting Ray-of-Beezy: 3 was worse than 2 for us. He's 4 now and it's calmed down quite a bit other than the questions -- they've increased. At 2 he was just up my ass and his speech wasn't the best so there was a lot of communication issues. 3 was testing every limit he possibly could and like I said 4 is mostly questions.

I've never given into tantrums, ever. I'd just tell him if you're going to scream and cry then go to your room, that would make him more upset, but at least it wasn't directly in front of my face or right in my ear. He'd cry in his room, tire himself out, and come out to talk. Same with being up my ass, you help or you go play and if neither of those are suitable then you're going to sit in your room by yourself. He's 4 and he still has tantrums (not as intense) from time to time, but he knows we use our words...and more often than not he goes to his room on his own when he's upset, to chill out.


Kids don't know how to clean and you can't really be upset with them for that because they honestly don't know how to do dishes nor do they actually give a shit about the dishes or your floor, they just care about the mess they can make and how fun it isn't to splash water all over the kitchen lol.

DS was sorting laundry by age 2-2.5, just colors and grabbing clothes from the dryer to put in the basket, or carrying light baskets. He's 4 now and he's old enough to help out with more (he can now measure and pour soap, press buttons, and nearly put away folded clothes). Sorting colors is something that could be considered fun (mine enjoys it) and you can't really screw that up considering you can double check, grabbing clothes is easy.

He still doesn't mess with the dishes unless it's handing me clean dishes from the dish washer and I allow him to put away some utensils. Limiting interaction with dishes is because I don't want him to cut himself on knives. He's been doing that since he was 3.

You're going to have to come up with a plan and a schedule, and keep things fun for him to an extent. I'm not one of those people who feel the need to entertain my child 24/7, but you need to be realistic when you include them in things. You need to think on a child level, not an adult level because like I said they couldn't care less about clean and dirty even if you enthusiastically explain the difference.

And...there's nothing wrong with sending kids to dad when you need a break here and there. Take advantage of the second body or you'll break down fast.

mommy211983
by Platinum Member on Aug. 2, 2014 at 10:55 PM
It's normal.
abera
by Member on Aug. 3, 2014 at 12:39 AM
my dd is 3 in a half and she is the same way!! I want the 2s back. she don't listen half the time. she throws a fit every time she has to do something. I have tried spanking I have tried time outs. I have tried calm parenting. NOTHING WORKS. A few months ago I was able to get her on a bedtime routine. but omg she is a pain. sometimes I feel like I have failed as a parent. and I cry. I'm glad I'm not alone.
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