I cheated on my wife about 6 months ago. I expected her to be jealous so I gave her all my privacy, don't go out with friends at all and have turned down business trip opportunities. However, to this point I have zero privacy: 1. Everytime my phone is left alone she immediately grabs it and starts goings through it, 2. I still can't hang out with any of my guy friends (a friend I had not seen in 3 years was in town and we got into a huge argument because I wanted to go to a pizza joint with him). 3. She accuses me of having affair with any girl co worker she knows about. 4. I have mandatory training yearly for work and she wants me to skip it (she says my bosses will have to get over it) 5. I have given up multiple business opportunities that require travel but as I move up in my career more travel could be a possibility, I love my career and don't want to leave. I can make more money if I move to industry but the longer I stay the more earning potential I have. She wants me to quit and go to a job I don't want yet.
I don't want to live like this forever. I'm at a point where I am considering divorce. He complications are that we have 2 kids (4 year old and 3 month old). What should I do? Is it on for her to act that way and for me to have zero privacy and zero life of my own for this long? If so, how long is enough?