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Its cancer, and hes only 9

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 18 Replies
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I follow the schools page on facebook, and they posted a status asking for prayers for one of the students, they didn't release the students name right away, and today they did. 

You know how kids have "boyfriends" in school? Nothing serious, just cute kid "marriages"? I know some will understand.

My daughter has been "married" to this boy since kindergarten. They draw each other pictures, they walk home from the bus stop together, they have been BEST FRIENDS since the first day of kindergarten.

And now he has luekemia. (spelled wrong) 

I feel so bad for him and his family, and I plan on donating to the fundraising garage sale and helping out everyway I can, but theres another problem weighing on my heart. 

My baby girl starts school on Monday. Shes going to find out...How do you prepare a 9 year old girl for that? Thats her best friend, i know there "relationship" is nothing, but they seriously are best friends. She can't wait to see him at school (he lives in a different town through the summer, so besides talking on facebook they dont see much of each other through the summer) 

any advice? shes never lost any friends or family members, and never had any serious illnesses like this. 

Im sorry if this sounds selfish of me.

Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 13, 2014 at 4:11 AM
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Replies (1-10):
SendMeBabyDust
by Platinum Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 4:14 AM
It's not selfish . I don't even know what to say . prayers for the little boy and strength for your daughter .
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sherry132
by Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 4:16 AM
3 moms liked this

My daughter's best friend had leukemia. She was 11 at the time. You sit her down and you discuss that her best friend is very sick. You tell her that he has leukemia and then you explain what it is. You let her know that he isn't contagious. Right now, she doesn't need to know he might die as St. Jude's hospital has made so many leaps and bond that leukemia is rarely fatal. Answer her questions, use google if you don't know something. Arm her with knowledge and she will do better than if she is listening to rumors. 

smalltownteddy
by on Aug. 13, 2014 at 4:31 AM
^ What she said. I bet there are resources online to help explain cancer to kids. I'm so sorry. <3
sherry132
by Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 4:33 AM
1 mom liked this

http://cancer.med.nyu.edu/patients/patient-care/supportive-services/straight-talk-kids


This might help

DevinAnnesmom
by on Aug. 13, 2014 at 4:44 AM
I would definitely talk to her before Monday, that way you can answer any questions she might have and she can be in an environment where she feels comfortable crying or reacting however she needs to.
I would talk about exactly what leukemia is and talk about what kinds of treatment he will be going through. I would NOT tell her it could kill him. Make sure she knows he's not contagious and that he could use good friends supporting him right now.
Good luck. I'll be praying for this boy and his family.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 13, 2014 at 7:19 PM

Thank you everyone for the advice. 

amandajoy21
by Silver Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 7:24 PM

Honest is going to be your friend in this case and allow her to be apart of the fundraising and even come up with ideas to help him feel better during treatment. At 9 you should be able to give her basic details about what is going on and see what questions she might have. Be honest with her because lying will only make it worse if and when she finds out the truth.

rmgriffberg
by on Aug. 13, 2014 at 7:30 PM

 talk to her before school starts. it will be eisier hearing it from you than from a teacher.

matofour
by Gold Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:12 PM
Talk to her before school, you want to be the one to tell her. Not to hear it at school.
My daughter (she's 9) lost one of her good friends this spring from cancer. It was quick, from diagnosis to death a matter of weeks.
We were honest, told her the facts (she had cancer, drs were doing all they could, etc). My daughter and her friends drew pictures, sent care packages and little things like that.
Once the little girl passed my daughter and her friend raised over 2000 (on their own) and have to the mom to help pay for bills.
It's still raw for her.
I listen, I cry with her, I let her vent, but most of all I let her deal with it the best way she can. And don't push her to do anything she doesn't want to (someone asked her about it this summer, my daughter said she didn't want to talk about it. We didn't push)

It sucks
It's horrible
I wish no one had to loose a friend, a daughter, a son, etc.

But, the best thing you can do is be as truthful as you can, be honest and open and be there to listen when needed.
katnjake
by on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:14 PM

Oh no, I'm so sorry. Contact the Live4Tay foundation and ask if they can help with donations or anything. 

"Your children need your presence more than your presents." ~Jesse Jackson

"If you have never been hated by your child you have never been a parent." ~Bette Davis

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