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niece overstepping when it comes to punishment

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 18 Replies
Before people start asking, she's NOT going to be watching my kids anymore.

Niece is 18 and moved in with us because she had no where to go. The agreement was that she wouldn't have to pay rent as long as she watched the kids and kept up on the house while DH and I work.

Yesterday DH and I went out to lunch alone (first time in years!) I get a text from her saying that the two oldest were caught sneaking popsicles, so she's making them do a couple extra chores. Fine with me. When we get home, I find out that "a couple extra chores" meant doing everything on HER chore list, plus she took away their DS's for the entire day...All over a popsicle!

I gave them their DS's back while she was getting a snack for the kids. She came into the living room when she heard the conversation, threw a tantrum, and then threw my 4yo's snack on the floor at his feet and stormed off to her room.

DH and I talked last night and decided it's time for her to get a job, pay rent, or move out. She thinks we're being unfair. What do you think??
Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:00 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:15 AM
Bump
Medic32
by Go PREDS! on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:26 AM
I think she is 18 and old enough to support herself.

I also think if you expect someone to babysit your kids regularly, you need to have a convo about appropriate discipline methods for poor behavior. Not take the wait and see approach then undermine them in front of the kids.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:27 AM

Maybe talk to her about what you expect from her and how to watch the kids.  If she messes up again then I'd make her pay rent.

TresHijas111825
by Gold Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:28 AM
Pretty much THIS. Did you not lay down ground rules?

Quoting Medic32: I think she is 18 and old enough to support herself.

I also think if you expect someone to babysit your kids regularly, you need to have a convo about appropriate discipline methods for poor behavior. Not take the wait and see approach then undermine them in front of the kids.
thetrollcat
by on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:29 AM

LOL she sounds like a brat most teens are working... She sounds lazy! WTH?

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:43 AM
We laid down the rules right from the start. DH and I work a LOT. Everyone in the house has a chore list, plus I have a "naughty kid/boredom" list of extras the kids can do if they say they're bored or get in trouble. Instead of picking an appropriate amount of chores for them to do off that list, she had these kids doing her chore list

Quoting Medic32: I think she is 18 and old enough to support herself.

I also think if you expect someone to babysit your kids regularly, you need to have a convo about appropriate discipline methods for poor behavior. Not take the wait and see approach then undermine them in front of the kids.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:44 AM
We did right from the start. She chose to ignore them though

Quoting TresHijas111825: Pretty much THIS. Did you not lay down ground rules?

Quoting Medic32: I think she is 18 and old enough to support herself.

I also think if you expect someone to babysit your kids regularly, you need to have a convo about appropriate discipline methods for poor behavior. Not take the wait and see approach then undermine them in front of the kids.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:45 AM

sounds like it's time to put her and her bags out on the street and say goodby to bad rubbish

TresHijas111825
by Gold Member on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:45 AM
Ahhh I see. Yeah, then it's for the best she doesn't babysit. Good Luck mama. ;-)

Quoting Anonymous: We did right from the start. She chose to ignore them though

Quoting TresHijas111825: Pretty much THIS. Did you not lay down ground rules?

Quoting Medic32: I think she is 18 and old enough to support herself.

I also think if you expect someone to babysit your kids regularly, you need to have a convo about appropriate discipline methods for poor behavior. Not take the wait and see approach then undermine them in front of the kids.
Medic32
by Go PREDS! on Aug. 13, 2014 at 8:45 AM
Then you address her, not the kids.

Obviously she isn't the appropriate choice of babysitter.

Quoting Anonymous: We laid down the rules right from the start. DH and I work a LOT. Everyone in the house has a chore list, plus I have a "naughty kid/boredom" list of extras the kids can do if they say they're bored or get in trouble. Instead of picking an appropriate amount of chores for them to do off that list, she had these kids doing her chore list

Quoting Medic32: I think she is 18 and old enough to support herself.

I also think if you expect someone to babysit your kids regularly, you need to have a convo about appropriate discipline methods for poor behavior. Not take the wait and see approach then undermine them in front of the kids.
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