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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

"You can't give her that, it's not fair to my kid"

Posted by Anonymous   + Show Post

My dd and nieces birthday are in the same week, and since they're close and go to the same school and have some of the same friends, we decided to have a combined birthday party this year. When talking with my SIL that dh and I were thinking about getting dd an iphone (She will be 13, we have told her she cannot have a smartphone until highschool, she currently has a little slide phone. This would be a complete suprise.) or a macbook pro (She needs a laptop for school anyway). She demanded to know why and I explained to her that dd has earned something nice like this with her grades, working hard during sports, babysitting the neighbors kids, and overall just being a good kid. Then she said "Well you can't give her that, because that wouldn't be fair to my dd." Um I'll give my daughter whatever I please, thank you. If I want her to have one and I can afford it, shut the hell up. She also said "My dd works harder than yours and is better at school, so if anything she deserves one." Like one, not true. two, that's fine, you buy her one. Smh

Edit: My niece is recieving a Coach purse filled with makeup from Too Faced, Mac, Benefit, Urban Decay, ect. As well as several gift cards. It all evens out. She's against my daughter recieving the laptop or phone in general because her daughter doesn't have an iphone or macbook. She's very competitve with the girls, always wanting them to be the same. Hell, one time my dd was offered a spot on the compition team at the studio they dance at together and sil asked me to not let her do it because her dd didn't get one and it wouldn't be fair. So, it's not just a timing issue, she just doesn't want her to have one at all.

Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 17, 2014 at 4:05 PM
Replies (11-20):
2007mommy2be
by on Aug. 17, 2014 at 4:11 PM
Eh I don't agree. Same school, same friends, family, close in age ... she's going to find out anyways. Idk, I just don't think kids should be taught to measure gifts etc. She gets what she gets and for good reason too.

Quoting Anonymous: Just don't give it to her at the party then?
echoishername
by Gold Member on Aug. 17, 2014 at 4:12 PM
1 mom liked this
You don't give your kid their gift at the party? Not being snarky, just curious.

Quoting AJsMom81507:

i dont get why you would give your DD her birthday present with all her friends there.  give it to her alone. 

Seagodess
by Ruby Member on Aug. 17, 2014 at 4:12 PM
2 moms liked this

I want to know how you responded to SIL.

I wouldn't care if she thought it was fair or not. Your kid, you give her what you want.

kaybayblee3
by Platinum Member on Aug. 17, 2014 at 4:13 PM

 

Quoting JulyBabies:

Glad I taught my kids the "life is not fair" lesson before they even entered school...

 

KairisMama
by Emerald Member on Aug. 17, 2014 at 4:15 PM
This. My DD and nephews party is always combined. We've never given our gift to DD at the party. We have our own mini celebration at home on her actual birthday.

Quoting Anonymous: Just don't give it to her at the party then?
Toonkasmommy
by Platinum Member on Aug. 17, 2014 at 4:15 PM
1 mom liked this
I definitely would buy my daughter whatever I want to buy. I would also give my baby her gift at her party like usual. She's just jealous.
TotallyTweedles
by Gold Member on Aug. 17, 2014 at 4:15 PM
4 moms liked this
You know it wasn't until cafemom that I found out parents arent supposed to give gifts at their kids' parties.

Quoting AJsMom81507:

i dont get why you would give your DD her birthday present with all her friends there.  give it to her alone. 

Seagodess
by Ruby Member on Aug. 17, 2014 at 4:16 PM

 Different poster here.

We dont usually give gifts from us at DS's party. Since his party is usually on the weekend, we give him his gift from us on his actual b-day. I leave the party for gifts from others. It takes long enough with that as is.

Quoting echoishername: You don't give your kid their gift at the party? Not being snarky, just curious.
Quoting AJsMom81507:

i dont get why you would give your DD her birthday present with all her friends there.  give it to her alone. 

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 7 on Aug. 17, 2014 at 4:16 PM
1 mom liked this
Im not seeing how its not fair. Does she always buy her dd everything you get your dd? They dont need the exact same things.
CrossStitchMum
by Platinum Member on Aug. 17, 2014 at 4:16 PM
We don't, just because if their birthdays not on a Friday (when we hold the parties) then we give their gifts on their actual birthday

Quoting echoishername: You don't give your kid their gift at the party? Not being snarky, just curious.

Quoting AJsMom81507:

i dont get why you would give your DD her birthday present with all her friends there.  give it to her alone. 

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