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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

my dad doesn't want me to go to my grandfather's funeral

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 18 Replies
"It's too far of a trip, and there's nowhere for you to stay, it's just going to be a small service in *our hometown* anyway" when I siad, "it's not a problem, I will take care of all that" he got huffy, "well think about it"

He even had my mom call me to tell me not to bother. She said, "I'm not trying to talk you out of going, just trying to explain why your dad said that"

I want to go, I just feel like I would be unwelcome. I will be the only one not there. My cousins will be there, why shouldn't I go? Especially since I can go, there's nothing stopping my ability to go.
Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 18, 2014 at 8:29 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Aug. 18, 2014 at 8:30 AM
3 moms liked this
Just go. You don't need his approval
shortyalicia
by Member on Aug. 18, 2014 at 8:32 AM
Go to the funeral. Don't try to let your family control your life, he was your grandfather after all.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Aug. 18, 2014 at 8:32 AM
1 mom liked this
What is the real reason he wants you to stay home?
Bethsunshine
by on Aug. 18, 2014 at 8:33 AM

Just go.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Aug. 18, 2014 at 8:34 AM
Why doesn't he want you going?
It's your grandfather's funeral, go anyway.
teri4lance
by Platinum Member on Aug. 18, 2014 at 8:34 AM

why would you be unwelcome?


Missdameanor
by Not-a-felony on Aug. 18, 2014 at 8:34 AM
Go pay your respects and say goodbye to your Grandpa girl! You won't be "unwelcome"
skrbelly
by Silver Member on Aug. 18, 2014 at 8:35 AM
Then go. That's it
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 18, 2014 at 8:41 AM
That is it. Honestly and legitimate. He can't handle inconvenience, or feeling like he's causing inconvenience. And if anyone breaks his plans he gets super anxiety and mad at the person. It's not me, it's him, and I get that. My mom said not to expect him to tell me I'm welcome, and him being upset is just going to bring out his anxieties more. I just don't want to add to his stress, it was his dad after all.

Quoting Anonymous: What is the real reason he wants you to stay home?
handy0318
by Ruby Member on Aug. 18, 2014 at 8:41 AM
1 mom liked this

He might just be feeling overwhelmed right now. Having a parent die is just an incredibly stressful thing to go through...even if it's something that is expected. When my dad passed, we had family coming in from out of town as well... granted, no one got huffy... but it was just a lot of stress trying to figure everything out. 

Try not to take things too personally and just go...making your own arrangements and stay at a motel if need be. Your dad is just going through a really bad time now...trust me. Cut him some slack. Afterwards, if there is an underlying problem, you might want to address it, but for now, just go.

My condolences regarding your grandpa.

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