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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

if having a child is so important to you lose the damn weight

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 192 Replies
6 moms liked this
My sil can't get pregnant due to her weight. Her and her husband have been trying to have a family for more than 5 years. Her doctor told her that unless she lost at least 50 to 100 pounds getting pregnant would be nearly impossible and carrying the baby to viability would be even more unlikely. After that they went to an adoption agency where they were told that because of her weight and health issues agency would. They went to several other agencies who told them the same thing. But when you think about it it kinda makes sense. With her weight her life expectancy isnot nearly what the normal adults is. She found that most surrogacy agencies have similar policies not that they could afford a professional surrogate anyway. She asked me if I would be willing to surrogate for her using her egg and her dh sperm. I said no and said that i couldnt emotionally handle it, i didnt mention that i feel that if she cant and ake care of her own health she has no business having a child to take care of. she went all dramatic on me. She said that since she has gone through the heartbreak of not being able to have a child and Since my helping her would end that heartbreak I should be willing to do this even if it does hurt. She kept crying that she wants a child and no one will help her and how mean I am and how unfair the agencies are. Finally, I had just had it. I told her that if she wanted a baby so badly she should be willing to lose the weight to do it. she stormed out of my house and within 20 minutes my mother in law is calling me screaming about what a bitch I am. I told her she needs to watch her tone because unless her daughter put down the cheeseburgers and gets on a treadmill I'm the mother of Her only grandchildren. by the way I'm sure there are going to be people who will reply that she might have a health issue that is causing this weight. That is not the case her doctor has ran every test in the book and She has been to several doctors trying to find someone who will tell her this isn't her fault. Every single one of them told her that if she would eat decently and workout even moderately she would lose enough weight to have a child
Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 27, 2014 at 1:40 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 27, 2014 at 1:41 PM

BUMP!

GhettoKoolAide
by Lighthouse Blues on Aug. 27, 2014 at 1:44 PM
It's not her life expectancy that's the problem it's her mobility that causes the issue.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Aug. 27, 2014 at 1:45 PM
4 moms liked this
I agree. Losing weight is a small sacrifice. She should want a healthy pregnancy and to be healthy for her child.
waddellfamily
by *NuTTerBuTTer :)* on Aug. 27, 2014 at 1:45 PM
6 moms liked this
Oh lord. Honestly I do not blame you for what you said to her! Some people just have to hear the truth. If it was me I would be running until I passed out for a baby I wanted so bad.!
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 27, 2014 at 1:47 PM
Quoting GhettoKoolAide: It's not her life expectancy that's the problem it's her mobility that causes the issue.
oh that's a good point. However I do think the life expectancy maybe at least part of the problem. I mean at her weight and in her health it's more likely than not that she will not live to see a baby born now reach adulthood
mysticatgal
by Silver Member on Aug. 27, 2014 at 1:48 PM
I couldn't be a surrogate. Being pregnant makes me super depressed and for her to go off like that is unacceptable. She should want the best for her kids and part of that is a mom who can play with them and give them a healthy lifestyle.
ramita
by Gold Member on Aug. 27, 2014 at 1:48 PM
1 mom liked this
I don't blame you. If it was so important to her she would do whatever it took. Obviously it's not she's just wanting to take the easy road, and for people to feel sorry for her.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Aug. 27, 2014 at 1:48 PM
3 moms liked this
That's sad but it is true. Honestly it's not your job to fix her problem because she is to selfish to lose weight. I know that sounds harsh but it's reality. That's like her asking you to carry her kids because she doesn't want to stop smoking or drinking. If she wanted kids that bad she would lose the weight.
JudyBlueEyes1
by New Member on Aug. 27, 2014 at 1:49 PM
1 mom liked this
The truth hurts. It sounds like she has a "pity me" attitude. I understand the pain of losing a pregnancy/infertility, but if it really is as simple of a cure as just kidding weight, she should consider herself lucky.
BrutalTruth
by urbullyisshowing on Aug. 27, 2014 at 1:50 PM
Lol...well...you were speaking the truth.
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