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Mom Confessions Mom Confessions

Dh has lost respect for me now that I'm a SAHM

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 601 Replies
4 moms liked this
I had a baby at the end of May and we decided I would quit my job so I could be at home with our preschooler and the baby. Ever since then, he expects me to do EVERYTHING around the house including cleaning up after him. He bosses me around with this attitude that I'm his personal assistant. I told him in not here to serve him, and he said, "well what are you here for?"

He talks to me like I'm a second class citizen in my own house. I think he feels like I'm less than him now that I'm not contributing to the household income. It's hurting my self esteem and I've told him how I feel but he just says that's not true but nothing changes.
Posted by Anonymous on Aug. 28, 2014 at 9:05 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Aug. 28, 2014 at 9:06 AM
63 moms liked this
People will treat you how you allow them to. You're allowing it, so it will continue.
OneToughMami
by Ruby Member on Aug. 28, 2014 at 9:07 AM
13 moms liked this
While his attitude sucks....the common expectation of a sahm is that she does the household stuff.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Aug. 28, 2014 at 9:07 AM
1 mom liked this
Youll get a lot of responses agreeing with your husband, sadly.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Aug. 28, 2014 at 9:07 AM
1 mom liked this

Im sorry, I cant imagine what that would be like.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 28, 2014 at 9:08 AM
1 mom liked this
How am I allowing it though? I tell him what bothers me but it continues. What do I do to change the situation? I'm at a loss.

Quoting Anonymous 2: People will treat you how you allow them to. You're allowing it, so it will continue.
barefootNky113
by Bronze Member on Aug. 28, 2014 at 9:08 AM
17 moms liked this
That's bull. Stop cleaning up after the man child and cooking for his lazy behind. Get a job and show him he can kiss your hiney
rockinmomto2
by on Aug. 28, 2014 at 9:08 AM
48 moms liked this

Stop doing shit for him. When he talks to you like that, say "You will not speak to me disrespctfully." and walk away. My husband and I decided that when our oldest was born, I'd stay home. For a while, he was bringing home his manager voice and using it on me. I finally had enough one day and told him to knock his shit off. Since then, he's made a really serious effort to not bring that home, and he's done really well.

I'd also consider therapy because you husband sounds like a major mysoginistic dick.

barefootNky113
by Bronze Member on Aug. 28, 2014 at 9:09 AM
2 moms liked this
That is sad.

Quoting Anonymous 3: Youll get a lot of responses agreeing with your husband, sadly.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Aug. 28, 2014 at 9:09 AM
Agreeing that I should be his personal assistant?

Quoting Anonymous 3: Youll get a lot of responses agreeing with your husband, sadly.
rockinmomto2
by on Aug. 28, 2014 at 9:10 AM
76 moms liked this

Household stuff is one thing. Cleaning up after a grown ass man and having him treat his wife like a personal assistant is unacceptable. I won't clean up after my husband because he can clean up after himself. Hell, these days I won't even clean up after my kids. They're all capable of cleaning up their own messes. In a home, EVERYONE contributes to its cleanliness.

Quoting OneToughMami: While his attitude sucks....the common expectation of a sahm is that she does the household stuff.


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