Tips for a crazy 3 year old? Warning, it's pretty long.
She fell in love with her binky as a baby. On her 3rd birthday, we had her throw them away, say goodbye to them, watched videos about it, etc. She was okay until bedtime. It was a fucking nightmare. She's so stubborn it was 3 hours of crying...we didn't give in. She got used to not having them until....her baby sister became mobile and dropped them everywhere for her to pickup. She started using them again at night, now thinks they're a necessity again. Now I have 2 binky addicted kids. Fuck the binky search. Ugh. I'm talking hour long meltdowns if you say no and waking up all night crying for it. Next week is the big cutoff. Wish me luck.
She is (well they both are) awful in the store. The one year old refuses to sit in the cart. If I buckle it, she will skin her legs on the belt making herself stand up. So I'm fighting with her to sit down and the older one runs and touches everything no matter what I say. If I put her in the back of the cart she's either screaming and crying or climbing out. I hate shopping. And yes, other moms are judging the entire time...I'm almost crying by the end. It's to the point I can't take them anymore until they're older.
The fucking screaming and whining is driving me nuts. Today she screamed and cried for snack. I told her to wait until I was done with the dishes. More crying but she did. When I sat out watermelon, goldfish and ice water she screamed and cried for blueberries. At this point I am ashamed to admit I got out the blueberries. (It's been a long day). Then she screamed and cried for the "big blueberries", wtfe that means. I told her to deal. It's just exhausting that she fights me on everything All Day.
Yes, we do spank, but obviously, on this child it does not work. We have done timeouts. We dont give into her every fit. I'm kind of at a loss and know I have failed as a mother and I feel shitty every day. She is a hard kiddo and I love her so much, I just feel like I'm doing this whole parenting thing all wrong and feel so stupid. How do you graduate college at the top of your class for this and not know how to control your own child???
She bites her little sister when mad about toys or anything. Says she's a "bad baby". Also the highlight of my day today was when she screamed at me for not giving her a midday binky that I "am not her mommy anymore and she doesn't love me" I know she's 3 and doesn't mean it but man that hurts! I just tell her "That's okay, I love you enough for both of us".
So usually I'm yelling at her all day, nobody is enjoying life and I suck. I've lost my cool a couple times and have screamed or spanked a little too hard--never leaving marks so calm your little cps dialers...but it just makes me feel 100 times worse and her too, I'm sure. I don't want to be that mom.
Side note: At her grandparents or my friends house she is a perfect lady. Please, thank you, the whole nine. Wtf? I know children are generally better without their parents but damn.
I know a lot of moms will say "I wouldn't let my child do any of that..." That's great, but how? Wtf am I missing here?
Okay, thanks for reading. Help if you can, please don't bash, I'm doing my best here. I've only ever wanted to be a mommy since I was 5. Who knew I'd be awful at it?