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Am I stupid for holding on?

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 11 Replies

 So I have this male friend that I've known for a couple of years.  I am the one that ALWAYS reaches out to him to say hi and see how he is doing, and I do this on a weekly basis.  So basically, I'm the one maintaining the friendship if that makes sense.  I know he wants to be my friend.  He never blows me off and we even hang out at times, but I can't help but get annoyed that I'm always the one that reaches out.  After a while one starts to wonder if the other person gives a damn whether they hear from you or not.  But I think I've allowed it to go for so long because he is a guy and guys don't always think like us gals.  I really don't want to lose him as a friend, but I would like to feel appreciated as a friend and to feel like he really wants me in his life.  Does anyone have a friend like this that they've kept in their lives and have overlooked them not really making enough effort?   

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:14 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:19 AM
Eh. After i got married i stopped talking to my guy friends or they stopped talking to me. The only person i really talk to is my brother in law.
Ecoseem
by Bronze Member on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:20 AM

I had one, but I got tired of trying to keep in touch so I dropped it.  It's been a few months since I've heard from him, but I've heard from others that his gf doesn't let him talk to girls so whatever.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:22 AM
Sounds like my brothers. I stopped making the calls
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:23 AM
I'd stop reaching out and see if he ends up contacting you.
Scarlevimama
by on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:24 AM

Drop the rope, just stop reaching out. If he cares, he'll contact you.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:24 AM

 Aaww, that's a shame.  His girlfriend knows about me so I know it's not that.  I have thought about just not reaching out anymore, but then I always wonder if I'm going to ruin a good friendship.  Maybe he genuinely doesn't think about it that way.  I should probably bring it up to him, but I want to spare him the added female problems in his life :-)

Quoting Ecoseem:

I had one, but I got tired of trying to keep in touch so I dropped it.  It's been a few months since I've heard from him, but I've heard from others that his gf doesn't let him talk to girls so whatever.

 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:33 AM

 I know deep in my heart that that is the thing to do :-(  I just need to get to that point!

Quoting Scarlevimama:

Drop the rope, just stop reaching out. If he cares, he'll contact you.

 

vegaswife2011
by LMAO on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:34 AM

No I don't. 

lalalamama
by on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:39 AM
I don't want to be around people who only spend time with me because " what the hell, I have nothing better to do ". Doesn't matter if they're male or female. That kind of relationship hurts self-esteem in long run and life's too short.
nverheyn2011
by Gold Member on Nov. 4, 2014 at 11:44 AM
All my friends from high school. Eventually I said fuck it. Haven't talked to the majority of them in 2 years. I haven't lost any sleep at night because of it.
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