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Bitter, infertile witch!!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 133 Replies
That's my sister. We used to be so close, until had my first. I was 17, and she wanted me to let her adopt it. She distanced herself from me for a while, but we overcame that. I was raped three years after I had my son, and got pregnant. She asked, once, if I'd consider letting her adopt, but was kind and respectful of my choice to abort, though she did ask that I not talk to her about it, which I understood. Then I got married, and had my second. Then my third and fourth (twins). Then our fifth. I'm now expecting our sixth, and I think our relationship is over. She has distanced herself more and more over the last several years, she doesn't acknowledge my kids when she sees them, and tonight she lost it, when my pregnancy was brought up. She said I'm selfish, and she can't stand me, because I can do what she can't. She called me names, said I didn't deserve my children, screamed about my abortion (something I did NOT want made public), and tried to hit my youngest when she started crying. That kind of snapped me out of my shock, I took my child, and told my sister I'm glad she can't have kids, she'd be a horrible mother, and we left. I feel bad for what I said, but it just shocked me so much! I had no idea she felt this way, but I won't tolerate her treating me like that. I am grieving the loss of my sister though :(
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 8, 2014 at 1:14 AM
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Replies (1-10):
wrensong
by Pagan Mother on Nov. 8, 2014 at 1:18 AM
3 moms liked this

It sounds like your sister has watched you get pregnant time after time, and has let all the bitterness from her infertility simmer, and finally explode.

She needs to get counseling to help her deal with her feelings.

I am so sorry you have lost your sister. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 8, 2014 at 1:21 AM
I think so. I kind of blame myself, I should have talked to her before this, but I'm not sure if that would have done any good. I plan to try and talk to her, but I don't know if we can come back from this.

Quoting wrensong:

It sounds like your sister has watched you get pregnant time after time, and has let all the bitterness from her infertility simmer, and finally explode.

She needs to get counseling to help her deal with her feelings.

I am so sorry you have lost your sister. 

myempyreofdirt
by Ruby Member on Nov. 8, 2014 at 1:22 AM
1 mom liked this
She lost the privilege of a rational reaction when she tried to strike your child. There is zero excuse for that. I'm very sorry this is happening to you, but I don't think you should feel bad. She provoked you, and you reacted.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 8, 2014 at 1:24 AM
1 mom liked this
I feel sorry for her. How sad.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Nov. 8, 2014 at 1:24 AM
2 moms liked this
You're not on PA, are you?

Because I'd be pissed, too if I was her.
wrensong
by Pagan Mother on Nov. 8, 2014 at 1:26 AM

Blame will do you no good. You did not cause her infertility. No one would expect you not to have kids, or to limit your family size because of her medical problem.

I'm sure it was really hard on her to want something so much and to see someone else get it time after time. I had a SIL who is infertile, and I have 6 kids. Five of them are biolgical and 1 is adopted. I always felt bad sharing news of my pregnancies (or the adoption) with my SIL because I was afraid it would hurt her. SO I do get the guilt feelings.

Give her time to cool off and hopefully you guys can talk it out. Has she considered other ways to become a mother? Foster care is ful of kids who need mothers (even if she is a single mom)

Quoting Anonymous 1: I think so. I kind of blame myself, I should have talked to her before this, but I'm not sure if that would have done any good. I plan to try and talk to her, but I don't know if we can come back from this.
Quoting wrensong:

It sounds like your sister has watched you get pregnant time after time, and has let all the bitterness from her infertility simmer, and finally explode.

She needs to get counseling to help her deal with her feelings.

I am so sorry you have lost your sister. 


Life in a Pagan Family (my blog)
http://lifeinapaganfamily.blog.com/
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 8, 2014 at 1:27 AM
No, not since I was 19. I was on it with my first.

Quoting Anonymous 3: You're not on PA, are you?

Because I'd be pissed, too if I was her.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 8, 2014 at 1:28 AM
That's what really set me off. That, and her blurting out information I entrusted to her.

Quoting myempyreofdirt: She lost the privilege of a rational reaction when she tried to strike your child. There is zero excuse for that. I'm very sorry this is happening to you, but I don't think you should feel bad. She provoked you, and you reacted.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Nov. 8, 2014 at 1:28 AM
I pity her, but that doesn't excuse her behavior, or give her the right to act the way she did, or to try and hit my child, or to share my private information with the room.

Quoting Anonymous 2: I feel sorry for her. How sad.
Missdameanor
by on Nov. 8, 2014 at 1:29 AM
4 moms liked this
What a crazy conclusion to jump to, considering the content of this post had nothing in it to assume she is on PA.

Quoting Anonymous 3: You're not on PA, are you?

Because I'd be pissed, too if I was her.
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