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Need opinions/advice on baby name...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 33 Replies
My daughter has her fathers last name. I don't regret giving her his last name as he is a good father to her. We were never married. We just recently broke up and I am due very soon with our second child. He never wanted this second baby and begged me to get an abortion. Obviously I never listened to him as his reasons were stupid. He hasn't done anything for this baby, hasn't been involved in the pregnancy which I kind of expected.

My confusion is now what last name to give this new baby. I don't know how he is going to be as far as accepting the baby after she is born, I would like to think he will treat her the same way as he treats our first daughter but idk. The thing is I'm afraid if I give her my last name the girls will both question it when their older as to why they have different last names and I would have no idea what to tell them. I am more leaning towards just giving her his last name to avoid questions in the future, but I also feel weird giving her his last name when he never really wanted her in the first place.

Any opinions/advice??
Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 8, 2014 at 3:34 PM
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Replies (1-10):
cadditalbrat
by Gold Member on Nov. 8, 2014 at 3:38 PM
I'd give her his last name.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 8, 2014 at 3:38 PM
Easier all around to just give her her father's name.
Gianna2014
by Ruby Member on Nov. 8, 2014 at 3:39 PM
1 mom liked this

I'd give the new baby the same last name as my other child, since they are full siblings. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Nov. 8, 2014 at 3:42 PM
How old is the first daughter?
TheSilence
by on Nov. 8, 2014 at 3:47 PM
If you don't think he will be in her life then give her your surname. I would honestly sit down with him and tell him you are considering using your surname since he doesn't seem to care about this child.
Pecuellar
by on Nov. 8, 2014 at 3:48 PM

Sorry sir, you don't get to pick one kid and not the other.  You said he is not a bad father to the first, so I would probably give the 2nd his name and hope his hard heart melts when it is reality. He is the father, so he needs to be the father.  can you imagine how your child will feel to see his/her sibling picked up, doted on and treated well, while they are tossed aside because "he did not want them".  heartbreaking thought.  I think you would be giving him permission to do this if you give in now and not make him responsible.

lollip0p
by Ruby Member on Nov. 8, 2014 at 3:49 PM
1 mom liked this
This.

Quoting Gianna2014:

I'd give the new baby the same last name as my other child, since they are full siblings. 

PacMan80
by Ruby Member on Nov. 8, 2014 at 3:50 PM
1 mom liked this
I would just give his last name. That way there's no confusion and so the youngest doesn'the feel slighted when she's older. Hopefully, since he's a good father to your oldest, he'll come around and be a good father for this one too.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Nov. 8, 2014 at 3:50 PM
How old is your daughter? I personally would give the baby the same name as her big sister so there isn't confusion. But if I was in your situation I would probably change my older kids name to my name.
Pecuellar
by on Nov. 8, 2014 at 3:50 PM

But he cares about the other one.  you can have it both ways.  He can't opt out of this ones life and expect to be part of the other ones, in her face.  might as well start daving for therapy now

Quoting TheSilence: If you don't think he will be in her life then give her your surname. I would honestly sit down with him and tell him you are considering using your surname since he doesn't seem to care about this child.


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