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Leaving your husband over video games??

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 53 Replies
1 mom liked this

      The truth is it sounds insane. You would think that you could work something out, right? Then you have those people that will tell you to pick up a controler and play with him. After all, it's a pasion, a hobby, and everyone needs some time alone.  That if I was a gamer then I would understand and share his passion. Then there are those people that say well you knew that when you married him so you have nothing to complain about. Sure, but what if that equals all of his free time. What if your marriage is suffering and your children suffer. What then, does it seem so stupid then?

    My husband has the weekends off. Typical weekend is friday nights from 7 p.m to 3 a.m. Back up by 9 a.m playing till around one. We made plans to go grocery shopping together. He fell asleep while we were making our shopping list and going over the ads. I went shopping without him because he wouldn't get up. By the time I got back up he was already up and back on his game. Played again until 3.am Sunday. Back up by 9 a.m again and on it all day minus a small break for dinner. I will give him an hour at the dinner table. Imagine this every weekend. Imagine that you add a few weekdays as well. He gets home by 5 p.m and then is on by 8 after the kids are settled. We will add typically three days during the work week.

    I have had people tell me that I am lucky he isn't drinking or always going out with his friends. I should be thankful that he is home every night. Well, I resent him. I resent him for having so much free time. I resent that I am a single parent and he barely spends anytime with his children. I listen to their comments, their frustrating. I do all of the housewrok, cooking, childcare, doctor's appointments, parent teacher conferences, homewrok help, etc. I do all of that. I have been a single parent for a long time. I don't have the choice to just throw my hands up and say I am going to go do this for ten hours. Someone has to take care of the kids. Someone has to feed them. Someone has to take responsibilty. I don't have a choice and I feel like he takes that choice from me. Believe me when I say I would not make any other choice it's just that he is supposed to be my partner. I realized the other day that in the past four days we barely spent 20 minutes talking to eachother. What kind of relationship is that?

   In case you are wondering I have talked to him about it. I have beg, pleaded and hoped that he would finally hear me,really hear me about the damage it is causing our family. He agreed to counceling, he said he understood, he claimed to be willng to do anything as divorce was not an option. He did cut back.It's not everyday after work and only a twenty minute dinner. We now get dinner every night with him and he is there at the table for about an hour but it isn't enough. So, does it seem unreasonable to leave him over video games?

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 24, 2014 at 10:59 AM
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Replies (1-10):
jennymajchszak
by Member on Nov. 24, 2014 at 11:04 AM

I know the feeling my DH does the same thing.

jupiter5
by Gold Member on Nov. 24, 2014 at 11:06 AM
I would leave a man for that. It doesn't seem silly at all.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 24, 2014 at 11:08 AM

I feel you.

It's one thing to love video games and play once in a while. It's a whole other thing to ignore your family and your responsibilities because of them.

But, it does sound like he is trying. Have you told him it's still not enough? I'd give him the chance to try some more. If he isn't open to that, leaving sounds reasonable to me.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Nov. 24, 2014 at 11:09 AM
I work with a guy like your DH. I feel awful for his wife. He is constantly complaining about her and how easy she has it, that she shouldn't get on his case for playing video games. He says, "ALL SHE HAS TO DO is cook, clean, and play with the kids." I've snapped on him more than once; I still vividly remember my days as a SAHM.

Sorry you're dealing with this, OP.
lincolnlady
by Gold Member on Nov. 24, 2014 at 11:11 AM
No not unreasonable. I could never live with that.
Leissaintexas
by Ruby Member on Nov. 24, 2014 at 11:12 AM
1 mom liked this
It can be an addiction, just like alcohol. If it takes away fro family, its an unhealthy thing. He may need a wake up call.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 4 on Nov. 24, 2014 at 11:14 AM

I can certainly understand your frustrations with your husband. Counseling for is a excellent idea and it even better that he is willing to go. I really would try to get alone time with your husband without the kids. Not just going growing shopping but a real date where it's just you and him. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 5 on Nov. 24, 2014 at 11:15 AM
I would've thrown out the system a long time ago.
Mazie0723
by Ruby Member on Nov. 24, 2014 at 11:15 AM
Do you believe he would neglect his kids to play a video game? If so I'd pack me and kids and leave. My husband and I enjoy video games but it's usually after the kids are in bed.
januaryqueen
by Platinum Member on Nov. 24, 2014 at 11:16 AM
I wouldn't leave dh for that.
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