Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

He's dying

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 2 Replies

My father is dying, and I'm more sad that I'm not very sad than I am actually sad.

He's been struggling for a few months now, with lung problems and heart problems and is going home on hospice care.

Of all the things I should probably be thinking about, I'm thinking that at best he was a mediocre father and at worst he was abusive.

Earlier I stared at myself in the mirror and told myself: Your father is dying.

I felt sadness, but there was no weeping. No sobbing. In fact, not a single tear.

I was never his princess.

I'm more sad for what might have been than anything else.

Thank you for listening.

Posted by Anonymous on Nov. 24, 2014 at 8:34 PM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-2):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Nov. 24, 2014 at 8:35 PM
That's ok. He never formed a bond with you. That's his fault, he made that choice.
AngelSinger
by Angel on Nov. 24, 2014 at 8:38 PM
First, ((hugs)). I know how hard this is. I am sorry that you are going through it.

I do understand. My father & I didn't get along. He was cruel, alcoholic and abusive. When he died, I also wondered if it made me a bad person that I wasn't more upset. I think the thing that upset me the most was that he died very suddenly, in his sleep. There was no chance to say goodbye. I got the call, and he was gone. That was in March 2010.

Everybody grieves differently. There's no right or wrong way. Me, I rarely cry or get emotional until after funerals and wakes are over. I just keep it together until it's over and I can mourn privately.

You're in my prayers.
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)