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my confession that kills me everyday!!!

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 158 Replies
1 mom liked this

My confession is that I am addicted to pain pills!  My doctor put me on them about 4 years ago and I loved the way they made me feel.  I began taking more than I should and even buying from friends.  At first I could just stop no problem but then as time went on when I stopped taking them I would get horrible withdrawals.  I told my doctor all about my problem and told her I wanted to stop taking them.  I thought maybe she would lead me in the direction to get help.  Instead she wanted to ween me off of them so just filled me another script with less in it.  Of course I just ate them all up.  When I do not have them I am so sick!  I want to quit so bad!  I have a 7 year old daughter who does not deserve a junkie mother.  I feel horrible about myself and I am in tears just writing this.  They have medicine to stop the withdrawals but you can not just get on it, you have to go to detox and maybe rehab.  I have a job and my daughter I can not just leave!  People who have never been addicted to them will never understand the feeling of death that comes over you when you do not have them, so telling me to just quit is not going to help.  I want to go to rehab for a month but I can not just up and leave my daughter abd job.  This is my horrible confession, guess I just needed to vent!

Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 4, 2014 at 9:36 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2014 at 9:39 AM

bump

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2014 at 9:41 AM

bumpo

TowerWife
by CrazyDogLady on Dec. 4, 2014 at 9:42 AM
5 moms liked this
Do you not have a suboxone clinic? Or a out patient mental health facility? Look into those and be honest with how addicted you are. Good luck
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2014 at 9:48 AM

BUMP!

Baker420
by on Dec. 4, 2014 at 9:53 AM
Do whatever you need to do to get clean. My brother died of a soma od.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 4, 2014 at 9:53 AM

BUMP!

graciebsgranny
by Bronze Member on Dec. 4, 2014 at 9:58 AM
19 moms liked this

Ok, so I'm going to sound like an asshole here and I certainly don't mean to, but I've been where you are and even further down. You can find a way to get your self somewhere where you can detox now, or you can wait til dfcs takes your child and you lose your job. Cause that's what's going to happen. You can't get better on your own and you're only gonna get worse. Addiction is no joke and it doesn't get better until you make the decision that you are sick and tired of being sick and tired. Please know that as a recovering alcoholic and addict with 3 years clean and sober, you will be in my prayers and if you need to talk, please feel free to pm me.

strongforthem
by on Dec. 4, 2014 at 9:58 AM
2 moms liked this
I'm sorry. You may not have a choice but to go to rehab. Either quit cold turkey and suffer, or go to rehab. Take a medical leave of absence from work.
If you dont do something drastic, this will only get worse, which will not end well for you or your dd.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Dec. 4, 2014 at 10:00 AM
1 mom liked this

You may not have to do an inpatient detox.  Some hospitals and substance abuse programs have an outpatient mobile detox.  The only reason you need to go to inpatient rehab following detox is if you truly believe that you cannot stay sober once you've detoxed.  Even if you meet criteria for inpatient rehab, insurance will only approve what is medically necessary. There are intensive outpatient programs, less intensive outpatient programs (possibly with evening hours if you need that), individual counseling, and self help.  You have to change the way you are looking at getting clean or you are going to risk overwhelming yourself and continuing to use.  The first step is to call the behavioral health unit for your insurance and let the case manager know what is gonig on.  They can help you to decide what level of care you may need and find a detox program that will work for you, as well as any subsequent treatment that you may need.  Do not quit cold turkey if you experience withdrawal when you don't use.  This can be very dangerous.  Medical detox is the safest way to go.  If you are going to need any time off of work, the best thing to do is talk with HR and get paperwork for FMLA and disability.  Depending on your workplace's disability policy, substance abuse may or may not be covered.  If your workplace falls under FMLA, this will help to protect your job.  Do what you need to do to take care of yourself now becase anything you put in front of your recovery, you will lose. 

Anonymous
by Anonymous 3 on Dec. 4, 2014 at 10:00 AM

Quoting yourself? Really?

Quoting Anonymous 1:

My sister is also in the same situation, we were going to quit together.  She looked into everything for us and went to a few places.  They all said you have to go to detox first.

Quoting Anonymous 1:

My confession is that I am addicted to pain pills!  My doctor put me on them about 4 years ago and I loved the way they made me feel.  I began taking more than I should and even buying from friends.  At first I could just stop no problem but then as time went on when I stopped taking them I would get horrible withdrawals.  I told my doctor all about my problem and told her I wanted to stop taking them.  I thought maybe she would lead me in the direction to get help.  Instead she wanted to ween me off of them so just filled me another script with less in it.  Of course I just ate them all up.  When I do not have them I am so sick!  I want to quit so bad!  I have a 7 year old daughter who does not deserve a junkie mother.  I feel horrible about myself and I am in tears just writing this.  They have medicine to stop the withdrawals but you can not just get on it, you have to go to detox and maybe rehab.  I have a job and my daughter I can not just leave!  People who have never been addicted to them will never understand the feeling of death that comes over you when you do not have them, so telling me to just quit is not going to help.  I want to go to rehab for a month but I can not just up and leave my daughter abd job.  This is my horrible confession, guess I just needed to vent!



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