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Please, I need others' opinions.... please tell me that I am not crazy...

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 71 Replies
My husband worked out of town all last week. He came home today. As soon as he came home, he hopped in my car and took off to where ever. Now, this has become the norm around here. He is hardly ever here anymore. When he isn't working, he is doing whatever with his buddy Daryl. When he is home, he sleeps all day. He is nonexistent. Anyway, so he came home today and immediately left again. Came back just before I put my son to bed and asked me if I would be mad if he went to the casino for a bit with Daryl. I said sure, why not. Yes, I was upset that once again I was left out of his plans, but he works hard and deserves a break, right? Well, at midnight he text me and says "we will be leaving in a bit, see you in a bit". I fell asleep. It is now 3:43 am and he is still out. Am I in the wrong for being upset? I never go anywhere or do anything that doea not include my husband and my child. Ever. And when I get the opportunity, Hubby shuts it down pretty quickly. Now he is saying that I am too needy and that maybe I need a, and I quote, "lapdog boyfriend". Does this not sound like someone who is not all in, or at all in, a relationship? Am I wrong here? Am I crazy?
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 20, 2014 at 5:46 AM
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Replies (1-10):
kadcas
by Bronze Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 5:51 AM
1 mom liked this
You are not crazy, but you need to find a non confrontational way to talk about it. He is not a mind reader and he might not know you care.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 20, 2014 at 5:56 AM
This is not the first time, not even close, that this has happened. I have made every effort to make him aware that I do not like the way things have been. Every time I try, I am just shot further down. I honeatly think that my marriage is about done. I am miserable far morw than I am happy. I am isolated from anyone and everyone, and I need someone to lean in. I can't lean on himas he is never here, and he has isolated me from everyone else. I try my hardest... I just feel like I have become his live in nanny/maid, rather than his wife and the mother of his child.

Quoting kadcas: You are not crazy, but you need to find a non confrontational way to talk about it. He is not a mind reader and he might not know you care.
Lindalou907
by Gold Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 5:57 AM

No, you are not crazy, that behavior is wrong. Ask him if he wants an open marriage.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Dec. 20, 2014 at 5:57 AM
1 mom liked this
You're not crazy . Talk to him and tell him how you feel if he can't take it I'd let him know he should pack and leave.
kadcas
by Bronze Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 5:58 AM
:( so sorry.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 20, 2014 at 6:07 AM
I have tried and failed. This is not the first time we have had this issue.

Quoting Anonymous 2: You're not crazy . Talk to him and tell him how you feel if he can't take it I'd let him know he should pack and leave.
chickensmommy
by Platinum Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 6:11 AM
Maybe he's cheating on you? You need that talk
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 20, 2014 at 6:11 AM
I think I am going to ask him if he wants a divorce. I just cannot do this anymore. I am tired of being a doormat, I am tired of being mistreated, and I am tired of being miserable. I cannot cry my life away, and I cannot be angry all of the time either. My son deserves better thqn this, and I deserve better. I am not perfect, but I bust my ass every single day to he the best mother, wife, woman that I can be and I just do not believe that this should be my norm. My son cries for daddy all the time. Then, daddy comes home from work and turns around and goes back out the door. I am then left with an almost three year old crying and asking why daddy won't take him bye bye with him.... I just cannot do this anymore!

Quoting Lindalou907:

No, you are not crazy, that behavior is wrong. Ask him if he wants an open marriage.

twinmommy27
by Ruby Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 6:11 AM
The only reason why you would be considered crazy is because you put up with it for so long. If he's not wanting to be home with you ever, there is really no point for the relationship to continue.sorry. Hugs!!
Zengirl79
by Ruby Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 6:12 AM
1 mom liked this

Have you ever met "Darryl"?

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