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She talks **** about him. *vent*

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 21 Replies
I am almost 32 weeks pregnant with my second child. When I found out I was pregnant I went out and started buying the things my DD would need, clothes, playpen, etc. I never asked for anyone to buy anything, not my mother or the father of the baby.

The father of the baby moved out of state, for a job, shortly after we found out that I am pregnant. I gave him the option to be a father or not -- I told him he could walk away but he told me he wanted to be there and he wanted to be able to drive down to see her every chance he got.

Well my mother bought things for the baby claiming that it is "her grandparent right"; some clothes, bottles (even though I am planning on EBF and she knows this), a swing. Now every time this stuff is brought up she says "well it's not like the father has contributed anything." I NEVER ASKED HIM TO. I never asked anyone to. It's like every fucking time she has to put him down and talk shit about him because he won't take a job down here working at McDonalds making $8/hr just so he can be close. Instead he found a job paying $17/hr (with more hours) and he had to move. I don't blame him. When she is born he has offered to give me $300/mo, which I agreed to.

I keep trying to tell her to back off but she just seems to think it is her business every time she buys things for the baby (and I tell her not to but she does it anyway).
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 20, 2014 at 10:55 AM
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Replies (1-10):
spooky415
by Emerald Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 10:57 AM
That would get on my nerves too.

My grandmother acted like my husband was a deadbeat when I was working.

I would take her grocery shopping and I'd get some stuff and she'd be like "Who's card is that? Why are you buying groceries? I thought HE worked."

Uh. The fuck?

And she would sign us up for toy drives and shit and be like "I don't want to stretch finances if you HAVE to work."
MichLW69
by PackersXLV4 on Dec. 20, 2014 at 10:58 AM
1 mom liked this
All I have to say is get the child support in writing and notarized so you're protected should he choose to stop paying.
blessed107
by Sapphire Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 10:59 AM

Simply ignore the negative comments.

AmaliaD
by Ruby Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 11:02 AM
It's your mom. Be honest. Tell her to stop. I'd be angry and tell her to keep the stuff, it's not worth the negativism.
1L2CMommy
by Gold Member on Dec. 20, 2014 at 11:03 AM
1 mom liked this

Your mothers right, and you sound like an ungrateful idiot.  Please continue to believe the loser that moved away when you got pregnant and has yet to provide anything for his unborn hild, over the grandmother that knows what's coming and is preparing.  Smh.  $300 a month, indeed!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 20, 2014 at 11:05 AM
I have tried that but it's getting hard to. I have been ignoring it for about 26 weeks now.

Quoting blessed107:

Simply ignore the negative comments.

Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 20, 2014 at 11:10 AM
I am grateful that she has helped and wouldn't mind if it didn't come with an excuse to bitch about the father. No one should be given something just to have something thrown in their face later on. If he doesn't provide then it's taken to court and handled that way. I'm not worried about it.

Quoting 1L2CMommy:

Your mothers right, and you sound like an ungrateful idiot.  Please continue to believe the loser that moved away when you got pregnant and has yet to provide anything for his unborn hild, over the grandmother that knows what's coming and is preparing.  Smh.  $300 a month, indeed!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Dec. 20, 2014 at 11:14 AM
If my DD was in that position I'd tell her to wise the f up. You don't tell a guy it's up to you if you want to be there/help financially provide for OUR child if you want. This child isn't just for Christmas, you will be in all ways responsible for this child until adulthood and things will become difficult financially when the only person funding you and your child, is you! I can understand you're upset with your mom saying what she does but you also need start acting like your eyes aren't half shut. No-ones saying he shouldn't move for a better job or that you need to be together, but you both need to provide for the baby and I hope you got an agreement from him in writing which was observed and signed by a witness.
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 20, 2014 at 11:24 AM
I gave him the option to walk away for good. I had that option when learning I was pregnant so why shouldn't he? Why is it that women can abandon responsibility and it's fine, but guys shouldn't be given the same choice? Now that he has agreed that he wants to take responsibility, if he doesn't it will be enforced in court, plain & simple.

My mom literally told me that he is a d*ck for moving, so yes she didn't want him to move. She would have rather he took the job at McDonalds (that he couldn't even get) than go out of state and get a decent paying job.


Quoting Anonymous 2: If my DD was in that position I'd tell her to wise the f up. You don't tell a guy it's up to you if you want to be there/help financially provide for OUR child if you want. This child isn't just for Christmas, you will be in all ways responsible for this child until adulthood and things will become difficult financially when the only person funding you and your child, is you! I can understand you're upset with your mom saying what she does but you also need start acting like your eyes aren't half shut. No-ones saying he shouldn't move for a better job or that you need to be together, but you both need to provide for the baby and I hope you got an agreement from him in writing which was observed and signed by a witness.
KennyPooPoo22
by on Dec. 20, 2014 at 11:33 AM
My dad kind of did that when I got pregnant we dd. I think he was really just upset that I wasn't married yet and all that jazz. Dh worked out of state but he found a nice house for us, put me on his bank account, asked if I wanted to get married, and told me to quit my job if I wanted. But all my dad saw was his baby girl pregnant and alone.
Bottles are a good thing to have on hand just in case breast feeding or not. So just brush it off the next time she does or says something stupid.
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