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rocky relationship

Anonymous
Posted by Anonymous
  • 8 Replies
I'm really not sure why I'm posting other than... I feel like I need to get it out but don't really have anyone to talk to.
Dh and I have been on shakey ground especially the past few months. We've had issues in the past but thought we were working and moving past all of it and things seemed to be getting better... They ended up getting worse a few months ago.
Things came to a head and got pretty bad, we talked and he made promises and changed two of the major issues (one I know for sure, the other I'm not 100% sure, but trusted that it was resolved and over with) but didn't pull through on the rest... Until this week.
Now he's going above and beyond and it makes me feel bad about being mad about it before BUT I have a feeling it'll go back to "normal" once he returns to work, I don't expect him to continue to go as crazy with it as he has been but at least make an effort and I'm not sure that'll happen :/
We've talked a million times and its always the same thing.... I feel like every time I'm about to give up hope completely he does something to make me feel like I shouldn't.
I know this doesn't really explain anything but the back story to it all would be very long :/
Posted by Anonymous on Dec. 28, 2014 at 2:20 AM
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Replies (1-8):
Sarah923
by on Dec. 28, 2014 at 2:58 AM

I'm sorry you've been having problems, and I hope he does try and keep with most of his promises. Wishing you guys luck. I know how frustrating it can be when your DH seems to not hear/want to change behaviors that are bothering you. 

Not really sure what your issues are so i can't really offer any advice, but I can wish you best of luck with everything!

Anonymous
by Anonymous 2 on Dec. 28, 2014 at 3:00 AM
If you died tomorrow would you regret spending your last days like this??
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 28, 2014 at 3:05 AM
Honestly... Idk anymore. Right in this moment, no I wouldn't.. The rest of the time, I'm not sure.

Quoting Anonymous 2: If you died tomorrow would you regret spending your last days like this??
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 28, 2014 at 3:08 AM
Thanks.. Some of it was more than just bothering me and was stuff that's just not okay and incredibly stupid, etc.
Mainly his careless spending, which got absolutely out of control this summer and out us into debt further, refusing to help with absolutely anything at home, and... Girls. Idk how to explain the last without the back story, nothing physical that I know of though.

Quoting Sarah923:

I'm sorry you've been having problems, and I hope he does try and keep with most of his promises. Wishing you guys luck. I know how frustrating it can be when your DH seems to not hear/want to change behaviors that are bothering you. 

Not really sure what your issues are so i can't really offer any advice, but I can wish you best of luck with everything!

Sarah923
by on Dec. 28, 2014 at 11:03 AM

I'm sorry to hear that, and I can understand it's more than just bothering.


Does he have any mental illness? I know those things that you have just described are symptoms of a manic episode (as in bipolar). Maybe he needs to see a dctor/speak with someone about these behaviors; maybe you could go with him to help remember all the things that happen. He may have some things out of whack that medication or counselng or someother method could help manage. If you love him, this may be worth exploring; it can be very hard for the person going through it.

Quoting Anonymous 1: Thanks.. Some of it was more than just bothering me and was stuff that's just not okay and incredibly stupid, etc. Mainly his careless spending, which got absolutely out of control this summer and out us into debt further, refusing to help with absolutely anything at home, and... Girls. Idk how to explain the last without the back story, nothing physical that I know of though.
Quoting Sarah923:

I'm sorry you've been having problems, and I hope he does try and keep with most of his promises. Wishing you guys luck. I know how frustrating it can be when your DH seems to not hear/want to change behaviors that are bothering you. 

Not really sure what your issues are so i can't really offer any advice, but I can wish you best of luck with everything!


Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 28, 2014 at 2:21 PM
He sees a therapist/psych of some sort (med refills for adhd)
But from what his moms been saying he's always been like this. I never saw any of this stuff while we dated or through the first year we were married. Now he's like that all the time. This week he's been doing a lot around the house and telling me to just relax, and that that's his Christmas present to me, but normally he doesn't do anything no matter what. From what I know he's stopped, or mostly stopped the other two major issues.

Quoting Sarah923:

I'm sorry to hear that, and I can understand it's more than just bothering.

Does he have any mental illness? I know those things that you have just described are symptoms of a manic episode (as in bipolar). Maybe he needs to see a dctor/speak with someone about these behaviors; maybe you could go with him to help remember all the things that happen. He may have some things out of whack that medication or counselng or someother method could help manage. If you love him, this may be worth exploring; it can be very hard for the person going through it.

Quoting Anonymous 1: Thanks.. Some of it was more than just bothering me and was stuff that's just not okay and incredibly stupid, etc.
Mainly his careless spending, which got absolutely out of control this summer and out us into debt further, refusing to help with absolutely anything at home, and... Girls. Idk how to explain the last without the back story, nothing physical that I know of though.

Quoting Sarah923:

I'm sorry you've been having problems, and I hope he does try and keep with most of his promises. Wishing you guys luck. I know how frustrating it can be when your DH seems to not hear/want to change behaviors that are bothering you. 

Not really sure what your issues are so i can't really offer any advice, but I can wish you best of luck with everything!

AngelSinger
by Angel on Dec. 28, 2014 at 10:07 PM
((Hugs))
Anonymous
by Anonymous 1 - Original Poster on Dec. 28, 2014 at 11:08 PM
Thanks.. He went back to his normal stuff today :( and saying he was sore and didn't want to move >.<

Quoting AngelSinger: ((Hugs))
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